Marriage and the Power of Divorce

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Khane

Khane

Got something right about marriage
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You are entitled to your opinion. But the point of marriage is that both parties are giving up portions of their autonomy to solidify, legally, their obligation to each other. It's a little dark to assume ownership of a person, and you don't "own" them in the literal sense, but that's why I quoted that shit dog. And if you aren't assuming control of your partner's sexuality among other things why even bother going through all the pageantry that is a wedding?

Look at Haast's story. His ex-wife thought she owned him, including half of everything that was his. Divorces can be intensely bitter and vengeful for that exact reason. "This is mine... YOU are mine"
 
Eidal

Eidal

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I suppose what I find hard to believe is that you guys would seriously just walk away if you met an amazing woman that you were convinced was perfect for you, solely because someone else happened to meet her first.

That seems so... bleak?
 
Khane

Khane

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No, we just don't live in a fantasy world where there is actually a person who is perfect for you and nobody else will ever do. Hollywood has fucked with your head.
 
Sutekh

Sutekh

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Eidal_sl said:
This is the dumbest thing you've written in a while, Khane. You must still be salty that no one believes how amazingly strong you are in the weight loss thread.

My wife and I do not "possess" one another in the same sense that I possess my cell phone or my computer, and even attempting to make this point just dilutes the English language. Why would you even bother to try and define the relationship a stranger has with his wife?
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LOL BRO YOUR WORDS JUST MAKE YOU LOOK STUPID XDXD.

Yeah he says some pretty stupid shit sometimes.
 
BrutulTM

BrutulTM

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Khane is one of the more fucked up dudes in this thread yet he gives advice as if he has everything figured out.
 
Haast

Haast

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Khane_sl said:
Look at Haast's story. His ex-wife thought she owned him, including half of everything that was his. Divorces can be intensely bitter and vengeful for that exact reason. "This is mine... YOU are mine"
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In fairness, she couldn't wait to wait to not own me personally. She was, however, a little more hesitant to not own my stuff.

The sickening part is that for years, she was always the stronger advocate for marriage and permanence. Then shortly after, when it wasn't the rosy paradise she envisioned, she flushed it without an ounce of emotion or effort to make good on the alleged lifelong commitments that she insisted that we gather ~150 of our closest family and friends to witness. She was an ice cold, uncaring bitch throughout the process, and the transformation happened practically overnight. This extended to any friend who dared question if this was wise, including her maid of honor and other bridal party members, whom she basically disowned afterwards.

Retrospect says this is a fairly fortunate outcome. I'm free of her, she had very little claim to my stuff, no kids or other complications. Though I REALLY wish she had this epiphany before I spent lots of money on a wedding, and dragged friends and family through the wedding and the aftermath.
 
Khane

Khane

Got something right about marriage
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When Sutekh disagrees with my viewpoints on relationships I feel extremely validated. Thanks Sutbro.

Not sure where I said I have everything figured out. I'm just keeping shit in perspective. I have a very healthy view and respect for marriage as an institution. I actually think about what those vows are supposed to mean instead of doing what many Americans seem to do and just wing it as the logical "next step". Marriage is a very serious proposition, and you are indeed agreeing to give up your autonomy because that's the point. To dedicate your life to this one person, forever.

Some of you just feel I'm a heathen because I don't want to partake in marriage. Or at least, at this point in my life I don't.
 
Haast

Haast

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Khane_sl said:
I actually think about what those vows are supposed to mean instead of doing what many Americans seem to do and just wing it as the logical "next step". Marriage is a very serious proposition, and you are indeed agreeing to give up your autonomy because that's the point. To dedicate your life to this one person, forever.
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I agree, and took the vows very seriously. It's sad when you find out the other party to the vows viewed them on par with penciling in a happy hour with an ex co-worker you never really liked.
 
Lejina

Lejina

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Eidal_sl said:
I suppose what I find hard to believe is that you guys would seriously just walk away if you met an amazing woman that you were convinced was perfect for you, solely because someone else happened to meet her first.

That seems so... bleak?
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That you would have no second thought about potentially running the life of another dude because you have a crush on his wife is pretty bleak.

I get that you made no vow to that stranger, but willingly doing something so damaging to someone is borderline sociopathic if you ask me. There's plenty of single women out there, you can find one without screwing over some other guy in the process.
 
Famm

Famm

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In fairness, most women tend to be breaking some other guy's heart every time they first start into a new relationship. Many of them are outright cheating and just justify it like the old/current guy knew they were "taking a break" or that he deserved it because feelings. Saying there's plenty of single women out there ignores the fact that most women aren't waiting for the right guy, they are waiting for abetterguy and they simply swing from branch to branch and hold on to the last one until they can be sure its time to move into the newer tree. Its actually pretty hard to not step on someone's toes, its pretty common that there's going to be resentment when you start dating someone, even if you never find out about the dude.
 
Cad

Cad

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Famm_sl said:
In fairness, most women tend to be breaking some other guy's heart every time they first start into a new relationship. Many of them are outright cheating and just justify it like the old/current guy knew they were "taking a break" or that he deserved it because feelings. Saying there's plenty of single women out there ignores the fact that most women aren't waiting for the right guy, they are waiting for abetterguy and they simply swing from branch to branch and hold on to the last one until they can be sure its time to move into the newer tree. Its actually pretty hard to not step on someone's toes, its pretty common that there's going to be resentment when you start dating someone, even if you never find out about the dude.
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+1
 
Gravy

Gravy

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Khane_sl said:
Some of you just feel I'm a heathen because I don't want to partake in marriage. Or at least, at this point in my life I don't.
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We are all different, man. I don't really care who you poke, I just like the stories.

In marriage, you definitely give up some autonomy. That's not always a bad thing.
 
Sutekh

Sutekh

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Khane_sl said:
When Sutekh disagrees with my viewpoints on relationships I feel extremely validated. Thanks Sutbro.

Not sure where I said I have everything figured out. I'm just keeping shit in perspective. I have a very healthy view and respect for marriage as an institution. I actually think about what those vows are supposed to mean instead of doing what many Americans seem to do and just wing it as the logical "next step". Marriage is a very serious proposition, and you are indeed agreeing to give up your autonomy because that's the point. To dedicate your life to this one person, forever.

Some of you just feel I'm a heathen because I don't want to partake in marriage. Or at least, at this point in my life I don't.
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It cant make you feel validated but that isn't something you should be proud of, it's pretty widely known around here that I actually know what I'm talking about.
 
Agraza

Agraza

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xSocy8E.gif
 
Jysin

Jysin

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Famm_sl said:
In fairness, most women tend to be breaking some other guy's heart every time they first start into a new relationship. Many of them are outright cheating and just justify it like the old/current guy knew they were "taking a break" or that he deserved it because feelings. Saying there's plenty of single women out there ignores the fact that most women aren't waiting for the right guy, they are waiting for abetterguy and they simply swing from branch to branch and hold on to the last one until they can be sure its time to move into the newer tree. Its actually pretty hard to not step on someone's toes, its pretty common that there's going to be resentment when you start dating someone, even if you never find out about the dude.
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+2
 
Big Phoenix

Big Phoenix

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Lejina_sl said:
That you would have no second thought about potentially running the life of another dude because you have a crush on his wife is pretty bleak.

I get that you made no vow to that stranger, but willingly doing something so damaging to someone is borderline sociopathic if you ask me. There's plenty of single women out there, you can find one without screwing over some other guy in the process.
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Morals and ethics are for retards.

Seriously, either a sociopath or down right retarded.
 
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