Cad
scientia potentia est
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Because you can't divorce kids. The little rascals need you whether you like them or not.
Marriage and the Power of Divorce
- Thread starter Grumpus
- Start date
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Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
Go here and give us your nominations!Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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My dad must've been the man or something.. he paid my mother $497/week in child support. I guess I never appreciated that because I never knew that he was probably paying way over what he needed to. I was young so I didn't really think about him paying $2000/month for me to live.
Onoes
Trakanon Raider
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Ohh yeah, I have no intention of ever with-holding, I hope that didn't come off scum-baggy or anything. I was simply trying to show just how much she is *not* trying to screw me, and how well we are still working together. Obviously, no one here knows me personally or anything, but I'm truly trying to make sure she is comfortable and taken care of, and that our kids have everything they need. I was shopping Amazon last night for an entertainment center for her (she has no idea I was doing this), and I paid her next years car registration a couple days ago when I got the email it was coming up for renewal. I'm sure there will be times where I help her with additional money in the future as well, I'm just planning on minimizing that as much as possible.
Anyway, was more trying to point out that we are still functioning normally, with very few friends or family even knowing our new situation right now.
Anyway, was more trying to point out that we are still functioning normally, with very few friends or family even knowing our new situation right now.
Onoes
Trakanon Raider
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Yeah, my dad too. In fact, he made a deal with my mom when I was 12, that she let him have me full time, but he would keep paying her child support like I was there.
I was surprised at how low the support is to be honest. I guess the AZ divorce system had an overhaul in 2011. That being said, if I change the form from "Essentually equal time" to "Mostly with mother", my payments change from $247 to $1,479 dollars. Thats per month. I would be homeless I guess? On the bright sides, my kids could get new cars every other year!
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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Oh maybe that's why, because my mother had sole custody and we sort of just went over our dads whenever we wanted. They were pretty good friends I think, so it didn't really matter.. and I was 16 at the time so I just drove over and stayed there when I wanted (usually weekends).
Fuck this, I am never getting divorced.
Fuck this, I am never getting divorced.
Big Phoenix
Pronouns: zie/zhem/zer
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TrollfaceDeux
Pronouns: zie/zhem/zer
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thank god it is not a bitter divorce.That being said, if I change the form from "Essentually equal time" to "Mostly with mother", my payments change from $247 to $1,479 dollars. Thats per month. I would be homeless I guess? On the bright sides, my kids could get new cars every other year!
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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Not until people start telling her how much money she deserves him to pay her.. then we'll see how friendly things are. Not that I hope this happens, because I don't, but I've seen it happen so many times to people around me.
Khane
Got something right about marriage
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How the fuck does that work? If it was equal time, and then it went to mostly mom time, wouldn't that just mean you need to double the $247/mo payment? That's a goddamn 600% increase. No wonder women try to screw men in a divorce.
Onoes
Trakanon Raider
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Yeah, its not a sliding scale. If we select mostly with mom it could mean that I only see my kids weekends or something, OR it could mean I move away and never see them again. There's no middle ground. Either we split time as evenly as possible, or its assumed the part time parent is basically absent.
Joeboo
Molten Core Raider
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Get the child support agreement in a written contract, and keep receipts for EVERYTHING
Buddy of mine separated from his wife, but she kept the kid and he paid her child support, but nothing that was written up formally or decreed by a court or anything. Year or so later she got pissed at him for whatever reason and went to court claiming he had never paid her any child support and she owed him a ton of back pay. He didn't have much proof that he had been paying here, he often just gave her cash, so he basically ended up having to pay again.
Things may seem amicable and agreeable now, but you should still do everything you can to protect yourself, there is no way to predict what will happen years down the road, people do change.
Buddy of mine separated from his wife, but she kept the kid and he paid her child support, but nothing that was written up formally or decreed by a court or anything. Year or so later she got pissed at him for whatever reason and went to court claiming he had never paid her any child support and she owed him a ton of back pay. He didn't have much proof that he had been paying here, he often just gave her cash, so he basically ended up having to pay again.
Things may seem amicable and agreeable now, but you should still do everything you can to protect yourself, there is no way to predict what will happen years down the road, people do change.
Completely agree. I've seen this happen before as well. If her life starts to go downhill some of the blame is coming your way. I've met a fair share of people who have nobody but themselves to blame for where they're at yet they always manage to deflect that blame to someone/something else. You will be #1 on that list for a while.
Ritley
Bronze Baron of the Realm
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I feel you bro, though me and my wife haven't been trying as long (only about a year to year and a half). We are both 27 until Christmas when she turns 28 so we have time, but she has PCOS which is probably going to make it harder for us to conceive. She gets depressed sometimes when all of our friends are having babies, some unplanned, and we haven't been able to.
Adebisi
Clump of Cells
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Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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Jysin
Ahn'Qiraj Raider
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Jysin
Ahn'Qiraj Raider
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Don't get me started. It's pretty much flat 15% of your income. My ex hasnt worked in over a decade. Because I earn so much, she basically does nothing and lives off of his support money. She has her own house (admittedly she bought before we had met) and at one point last year started bitching about the fact she couldnt buy a car because we dont have a written court agreement and therefore no income verifiable on paper. (She is British, I am American) It just blows my fucking mind she is being paid enough to support a kid, maintain a house, pay a mortgage, and buy a car all with my child support payments.
I told her once that "by all means, buy anything my son needs. But extra money should be put away in an account for education or a future for HIM! It's calledchild supportnot Caroline support!" ... Yea, that conversation didnt end well.
Add to the fact we were never even married. It just drives me nuts!
Tarrant
<Prior Amod>
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My ex wife wanted mine raised not to long ago. To give a bit of backround here.....
She rents a 3 level house for just under $500 a month (she lives in an area where $10 an hour is a high paying job), she had twins with the guy she had her affair with, he b/f just started probably his 20th job in 4 years and is only working 30 hours a week. They order every single UFC and WWE pay per view in existence, go out all the time and don't save a nickle.
Anyways, she tells me "Do you have any idea how hard it is to raise and support 4 kids on around $1000 a month?"
I responded, "I'm not paying you to raise four kids, I'm paying you to raise two kids and if you are unable to do so please by all means let my lawyer know and he'll take care of everything going forward from there."
She got super pissed and fought to get it raised...and failed.
Almost none of my money goes to properly clothing my kids, they eat like shit and it pisses me off to no end. Last time I talked to her she told me how she just took the family to some water park that was $200 a night for them all to stay and there were there for three days. Yet shes broke all the time which means my kids are going without.
God forbid the courts up there though listen to a fucking word I or my lawyer say, nope...kids are always better off with their mother in the 1960's mentality of an area they fucking live in.
Fuck that area, fuck those people and fuck a shit system that is slowly getting better at a rate that is not nearly acceptable.
She rents a 3 level house for just under $500 a month (she lives in an area where $10 an hour is a high paying job), she had twins with the guy she had her affair with, he b/f just started probably his 20th job in 4 years and is only working 30 hours a week. They order every single UFC and WWE pay per view in existence, go out all the time and don't save a nickle.
Anyways, she tells me "Do you have any idea how hard it is to raise and support 4 kids on around $1000 a month?"
I responded, "I'm not paying you to raise four kids, I'm paying you to raise two kids and if you are unable to do so please by all means let my lawyer know and he'll take care of everything going forward from there."
She got super pissed and fought to get it raised...and failed.
Almost none of my money goes to properly clothing my kids, they eat like shit and it pisses me off to no end. Last time I talked to her she told me how she just took the family to some water park that was $200 a night for them all to stay and there were there for three days. Yet shes broke all the time which means my kids are going without.
God forbid the courts up there though listen to a fucking word I or my lawyer say, nope...kids are always better off with their mother in the 1960's mentality of an area they fucking live in.
Fuck that area, fuck those people and fuck a shit system that is slowly getting better at a rate that is not nearly acceptable.