DickTrickle
Definitely NOT Furor Planedefiler
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Who initiated the breakup? Who was the first to say it wasn't working or something needed to be changed?
Marriage and the Power of Divorce
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I thought he said it was more that she wanted kids and he didn't. But maybe I'm mixing people up.
Sutekh
Blackwing Lair Raider
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She was sad one day and I asked her what's up? He told me how she was sad where her life is and how she wasn't able to break out from that stuff and do the things she wanted to do, I asked if it was related to me and she said yeah, after that we just talked for a while a figured it was best for us to see different people.
I'm just trying to understand why everyone here thinks I want to fuck her still! I mean in hindsight I probably could have changed my ideals about a relationship to make her more comfortable, I'm sure if we had a kid she'd be happier and it would've been able to help our relationship.Phazael_sl said:
@a_skeleton_03 not cool bro, unfriended.
Khane
Got something right about marriage
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This sounds right, which is as good a reason as any for parting ways romantically. Which actually makes even more sense now that I think about it.
If I was with a woman who I was attracted to physically, mentally and emotionally and we got along great and had similar hobbies and the only thing between us was that difference of opinion I'd have a hard time giving up the nookie and getting her out of my head too. It would be the right decision but that wouldn't make it any easier.
Phazael
Confirmed Beta Shitlord, Fat Bastard
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Well look, its your life and I am not there, but I know the sound of a young guy believing his own bullshit and from where I am standing, that is what it sounds like. And it seems like your hangup on the ex is sabotaging other relationships, which is the cause for concern. As I said, I made those unforced errors when I was your age and its painful to watch from a distance (assuming my take is accurate). I am not trying to call you out here, just sincerely trying to be helpful. And frankly, you sound like you are not totally convinced yourself.
My wife and I have actually reopened the conversation about children. At first we were both on the "No" side of camp but we're both drifting towards the "Not sure" side. Which is, honestly, a much scarier place to be. Children are such a life altering event that I feel like I, or should I say we, should have a stronger opinion one way or another. But since my brother had his first child we've both softened our stance on the matter. It honestly freaks me out we're not sure. I think of one of us really leaned heavily one way or another we'd go that way but since neither of us are sure anymore it makes it this weird limbo state. So we'll see if the future holds a little mini Tenks or not.
Sutekh
Blackwing Lair Raider
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You see, after dealing with my niece and nephew the last thing I want is children. It just reinforced my opinion on the subject holy shit.
@Phazael, thanks bro
What happens if I make it 3 more years with this opinion? Do I win life?
We need to go ahead and get this out of the way - when was the last time financially assisted your ex common law wife whom lives on the other side of the planet and is married? Does your trip in two months coincide with her anniversary? Have you or are purchasing gifts to give her? Are you staying at a hotel or sleeping in her bed? What do you plan on doing with her?
We're both early 30s. Which means we need to shit or get off the pot in regards to the decision.
BrutulTM
Good, bad, I'm the guy with the gun.
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Based on your posts here it is taking you a bit longer than most to grow up.
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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30's is a long range bro, 10 years in fact
@Tenks, I was in the same camp too. I was a "no kids" person, slowly turned to a "not sure" person, then decided I wanted to. Reason being was I loved my wife, knew how much she wanted to be a mother, and felt like I could do a good job of raising a tiny rigatoni. I got my career started, bought a house, and decided I wanted to raise a kid/kids with my wife. I would never go through with it if I were still in the "not sure" category, that's for sure. Once I moved over to yes, i just went with it.
I don't know if it was my age, maturity, or just a special bond I felt with my wife.
Sutekh
Blackwing Lair Raider
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I still send her money in the mail regularly to help with living expenses since they're so high in Switzerland, I regularly get her gifts but she made me stop a couple weeks ago.
You fucking kidding bro? I don't do anything for her, she's got her own stuff going on, we exchanged presents on christmas but that's about it.
Frenzied Wombat
Potato del Grande
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Um, excuse me if this has been answered earlier in the thread, but why the fuck would you send your remarried ex-wife on the other side of the planet coin and gifts?
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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Did you buy her a microwave and did she give you a giftcard for christmas? I just want to know if you've ever walked down the street drunk screaming WHY DONT YOU LOVE ME
Soygen
The Dirty Dozen For the Price of One
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Sutekh
Blackwing Lair Raider
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Does the trip coincide with her anniversary?
Where are you staying?
What are you doing while you visit your ex common law wife?
Was Christmas gifts it, or "about" it? What else was there?
What did you give her for Christmas?
What did you get from ECLW (Ex Common Law Wife) for Christmas?
