Parent Thread

I only saw one that was done by that Temple Grandin chick who has autism and they did the HBO movie about. Which, come to think of it, in that movie they showed a similar technique that she used on herself and the livestock.

Somehow the pressure of the weight in the vest is calming. I have encountered a similar effect when our children were infants - blanket weight made them calmer and went to sleep better.

No idea the science of it all.

The best thing about having a 2 year old son? I can rip the loudest belch known to man ON his face and he just doesn't give a shit. He waits and bides his time then he farts on me. It's a constant battle. We're at a deadlock.

Alkorin said:

No way, man. He's winning, because he gives zero fucks.

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Shut your dirty mouth!

It's the hope that keeps me going.

My son rips loud farts. I've been blamed more than once only to see him stand up in the corner and laugh like a fuckin maniac

My 6 year old the other day ripped a huge fart and looked at my my wife and me and yelled "I AM THE FART MASTER!" She's pretty damn cool.

Best fart story I've heard from my brother is his 5 year old son walked over to him while he was sitting in this computer chair and cupped his hand then waved it in front of my brothers face. My brother said it was like being punched in the face by a fart. Kid dropped an SBD then pushed it into my brothers face. Totally amazing.

I'm fighting the ear infection hell that many people have fought. post if you have any secret lumi garlic recipes. Kids are 2 and 6 months

We had about 4-6 months and thought we beat it, but we're on infection 4-5 st 22 months, so probably time to bite the bullet? Some people say it clears up at around 2. (Ear infections)

The other night my wife and I went on our first date night in a long fucking time. Like, 2 years I think. She won some concert tickets, which I hadn't been to a concert in forever so that was cool as fuck. We don't have cable so we had to basically train the sitter to use the fire tv stick + plex and assorted apps, and left an unlocked device for her to use. Apparently, she doesn't really watch many movies so she was browsing our plex and found that movie Sausage Party and put that on for the kids. I think she said they made it about 3 minutes in. Hilarity.

... I may be walking into something bad here... but this is the adulting forum and the parent thread...so, sorry in advance and Alk u know ur a bro - luv ya.

I preface this with, I am not in the situation of having a child with autism or other spectrum disorders / problems / issues - sorry if not the PC proper terms -

But a lot of the external issues with many of these kids is they act out, go crazy - "normal" kids do that also - just not to the degree or intensity.

here is the step into a shitstorm, sorry...

But I spanked my kids, both girls - so did my wife, we had this discussion before we had kids and heck even before we got married - we both got spanked growing up - we both agreed upon consistent followup to all punishment claims, and that has been the hardest part of parenting and we still struggle. We tried a bit of a mix, spanking and time out at the beginning and time out was just absolutely pointless while they were younger - so I may put our strategy in like with ending WW2 with nukes... we started strong and consistent and set a ground work that they understand... now timeouts and whatnot are all we use, however if the punishment is ever stated as a spanking, its what they get, never "lowering" the punishment for no reason - it breaks consistency. Neither of my kids are "hitters" nor do they think that they themselves can issue punishment to other kids etc. There have been times we have issued grace and not given an earned punishment - because they did something redeemable, admitted on their own, atoned on their own accord without guidance or prompting - and it was explained to them, every punishment was explained to them.

To me this staved off my children's terrible 2's and 3's drastically - and if I look at both of them, if anything the younger one that I think we were more leanant on, is the "worst" about tantrums etc.

Every fam I have known personally that has a child with any type or level of this issue - even those that had kids previously and did use spankings etc. then suddenly DO NOT- like its even MORE SUPER TABOOO to even think about or consider that some well structured and supported and explained etc corporal punishment to any level for any child of any spectrum issue is just wrong... why? I get not to beat full on mentally handicap kids - but children who are just slightly on the spectrum, learn, read, adapt etc. etc. just have outbursts and other extremities is it not considered as a viable option.

- yes I know, I told you I may be stepping into a shitstorm - but note this is not saying anyone should do things or not do things, its more of a generalized topic to ponder and discuss - is it because it IS non effective in practice, or is it more because its a social stigma and taboo?

And you do not need to link me articles that spanking is bad... my kids don't kill animals or burn ants with a magnifying glass with a big smile or torture their babydolls or do any of that other off the rail shit that "leads to a destructive adult life because of spanking" or other nonsense. From being in with other parents and being an aware kid growing up - all the off the rail bad kids that I knew that did all that shit were the ones that "spared the rod" and just put little johnny frog squishier in time out- oh bad boy! (real story in the frog one fyi kid was spoiled, never got a spanking in his life and was only disciplined with time outs)

Alk I think you could cure the autism by beating your child

Did I say that? No. Don't be dumb noodles

Alk I am sure does everything he can and cares and loves for his kids and provides the most- again this is not "to him"

My observance was just that, and as stated a question or discussion... Every child is different and responds to things differently and parenting you have to be sure to do whatever you and be flexible, change and adjust.

also spanking is not beating.

Selection bias, you say "spanking staved off the terrible 2s" but you have no way or knowing that.

Spanking is child abuse. I get that is an uncomfortable thing to hear, but it is. You don't want to see the science, per your post, but it's out there and it isn't controversial. It would be unbelievably cruel to spank my child for having an outburst they can't control due to some disorder. It isn't an option. It's tempting, all the fucking time, for sure. I get frustrated and angry. That's just weakness in me, that does not mean it is the correct thing to do.

Also, I'm not passing judgement on you. Lots of people spank there kids. My dad spanked me. My grandmother spanked her kids. But it is what it is.

It is not child abuse - its discipline. If I go off and beat them etc. then it is abuse. She got a bruise yesterday from running herself into a bench at the playground, more damage than any spanking either has ever gotten, how she didn't see the stupid bench- who knows

Control is the same as it is for adults, to be all SJW term- we all get triggered all day long, we enact self control and restraint. Are you saying that, at any level of issue or disorder that they cannot learn control? they are outside of understanding consequence and action/reaction? That there is and never will be an ability to have self control?

And the science, is about as science as fucking bill nye - if we go back before it was something of social scorn, there was science that said it could yield positive results - there is also a bunch of "living proof" that discipline actions that sometimes involve spanking is effective, just as much as not.

I never claimed that it was an end all answer - I specifically gave example I have seen where that method of discipline is just taken off the table completely in a fam that advocated it previously- if it does not work, fine. If the kid does not understand, or does not have the mental capacity to understand, I get it.

If truly we are just to say "oh something triggered them, and nothing could be done, they will never learn to restrain themselves, they never can comprehend that their actions are not good" fine, your right - just do not do anything, nothing will work, nothing will ever teach them to cope, analyze, problem solve in their mind an action or reaction cause.... nope.. but I tend to give these kids more chance than that, being a kid, having kids - kids nature is not to be tempered and tempering them is part of raising them up. So sorry that I feel most of these kids could learn and understand and develop beyond just saying fuckem let them do whatever.

And it was abuse it would be issued as such in our laws and statutes, its not- even after all these years of super science. Is there a line that too many bad parents cross? yes - but to me that does not dismiss or demonize the discipline before the line.