Red Pill: Bitches Are All the Same / MRA Circle Jerk
- Thread starter Himeo
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Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
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Dandai
<WoW Guild Officer>
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- 4,504
Reading through the back and forth of Himeo, Antarius, and a_skeleton_03 compels me to share a little about my relationship with my wife and a story that I'll never forget. When I was in the military I had some serious medical problems that no one was able to diagnose. I saw doctor after doctor, and my wife would always join me at the appointments. She was, admittedly, becoming quite the hypochondriac, reaching for anything that would explain what was happening to me.
I'll never forget when my wife suggested some wild ass disease and even provided the doctor with the symptom list and pointed out how it matched everything I was experiencing. The doctor looked it over, nodded, smiled, and handed the paper back to my wife. Doc said, "You're right; your husband is experiencing all of these symptoms. Unfortunately, I can't diagnose him with this because he's not experiencing XYZ."
My wife was at first incredulous and raised up to defend her research... but the realization that doc was right came crashing down, crushing the passion she had only a few moments ago. She looked morose and defeated. After a long, pregnant silence she said, "I really thought we figured it out this time."
Doc smiled warmly, almost apologetically. Then she reached out, patted my wife's hand, and said, "Sweetheart, sometimes when we're a hammer, all we see are nails." She wasn't being malicious or snide, just pointing out the problem of confirmation bias and how it shapes and distorts our perceived reality.
---
It seems to me that red pillers desperately want to compartmentalize their reality into neat, cleanly defined boxes. Looking at red pill like that, I can see why it's so attractive. Female interaction can be dissected, analyzed, and planned. I got to admit, I would've really appreciated red pill when my social intelligence was so low that I was unaware that there even was such a thing as social intelligence.
However, like anything else, there are pros and cons to a highly compartmentalized world view. On the bright side, it's nice to have well-managed expectations. You're probably going to be pretty even-keel, even in the shittiest of circumstances (for example, finding out your girl who says she loves you is actively engaging romantically with another dude). On the flip side, by compartmentalizing everything, you artificially inhibit your ability to truly appreciate the complexity and nuances of the human experience (ie the belief that all women can be cleanly defined as XYZ, but there are actually an infinite number of variants).
---
As an aside, my health problems all started within months of getting married to my wife. I had major surgery a few weeks prior to our first anniversary. It took me months of bed rest to recover. Even though the prospects of major improvement were grim (all agreed that this would be a life-long, debilitating condition), amazingly enough, all of my symptoms went away. My wife and I have been married 8 years now. She stuck with me in spite of the fact that it looked like she'd married a man doomed to be a vegetable at the ripe age of 22. Even though she had every opportunity and motive to leave me, she didn't.
I only mention this because I think red pillers should hear more stories about happy, successful couples to offset the stories of shitty people doing shitty things to each other.
I'll never forget when my wife suggested some wild ass disease and even provided the doctor with the symptom list and pointed out how it matched everything I was experiencing. The doctor looked it over, nodded, smiled, and handed the paper back to my wife. Doc said, "You're right; your husband is experiencing all of these symptoms. Unfortunately, I can't diagnose him with this because he's not experiencing XYZ."
My wife was at first incredulous and raised up to defend her research... but the realization that doc was right came crashing down, crushing the passion she had only a few moments ago. She looked morose and defeated. After a long, pregnant silence she said, "I really thought we figured it out this time."
Doc smiled warmly, almost apologetically. Then she reached out, patted my wife's hand, and said, "Sweetheart, sometimes when we're a hammer, all we see are nails." She wasn't being malicious or snide, just pointing out the problem of confirmation bias and how it shapes and distorts our perceived reality.
---
It seems to me that red pillers desperately want to compartmentalize their reality into neat, cleanly defined boxes. Looking at red pill like that, I can see why it's so attractive. Female interaction can be dissected, analyzed, and planned. I got to admit, I would've really appreciated red pill when my social intelligence was so low that I was unaware that there even was such a thing as social intelligence.
However, like anything else, there are pros and cons to a highly compartmentalized world view. On the bright side, it's nice to have well-managed expectations. You're probably going to be pretty even-keel, even in the shittiest of circumstances (for example, finding out your girl who says she loves you is actively engaging romantically with another dude). On the flip side, by compartmentalizing everything, you artificially inhibit your ability to truly appreciate the complexity and nuances of the human experience (ie the belief that all women can be cleanly defined as XYZ, but there are actually an infinite number of variants).
---
As an aside, my health problems all started within months of getting married to my wife. I had major surgery a few weeks prior to our first anniversary. It took me months of bed rest to recover. Even though the prospects of major improvement were grim (all agreed that this would be a life-long, debilitating condition), amazingly enough, all of my symptoms went away. My wife and I have been married 8 years now. She stuck with me in spite of the fact that it looked like she'd married a man doomed to be a vegetable at the ripe age of 22. Even though she had every opportunity and motive to leave me, she didn't.
I only mention this because I think red pillers should hear more stories about happy, successful couples to offset the stories of shitty people doing shitty things to each other.
- 6,051
- 6,036
I don't think they're interested in happiness and success, Dandai. That's the thing. As far as I can tell, they're interested in banging as many chicks as possible, and if that's their narrow definition of happiness and/or success, RP probably works out well for them as it allows them to view life in a really narrow-minded fashion, conducive to what they're looking for.
Meanwhile, the rest of us that have what we view as happiness and success in our marriages/relationships will continue to enjoy what we have. To each their own, I suppose. I just don't see the end result of RP thinking as worthwhile or attractive. That could be because I'm married and content, but hey, what do I know?
Meanwhile, the rest of us that have what we view as happiness and success in our marriages/relationships will continue to enjoy what we have. To each their own, I suppose. I just don't see the end result of RP thinking as worthwhile or attractive. That could be because I'm married and content, but hey, what do I know?
Confirmation bias, anecdotal evidence aside, I think you would agree that you glossed over a pretty major point here. You probably know a lot of divorce stories from your military background and instead of blaming the women for cheating on their husbands, you thought it was the guys fault because they didn't see she was a harpy. And that's really a good point, these men are not fucking ready. Some TRP narrative might say "oh those women, terrible whores, fuck marriage", but a smarter approach would be to say "why did those guys let them selves get fucked over?". I think you touch on this yourself with this, guys who too quickly jump into a relationship and were simply weren't ready or didn't know what they were getting into.
And I think you do this intuitively, which makes it incredibly hard for you to relate to those who fail.
What you don't do however, is analyse why guys keep getting caught up in the same scenarios. Why do they grow up assuming that marriage isn't a major risk, why do the guys assume that they won't get fucked over.
What you can't deny is the large populace of people who have shitty lives due to alimony, divorce rape, being cuckolded, dead bedrooms, single guys who don't understand the dating scene who are incredibly unhappy.
You simply just ignore that, see that you have a great relationship and assume that TRP is just bad advice. I will just say this: It's very easy in this society to grow up with the completely wrong attitude towards social interaction, be it in your goals to have sex or be married. It's so easy to fail through bad nature and nurture, through how society has changed in modern day life. And those that do make it through unscathed, perhaps like yourself, have only assumed they understand it best because they've yet to fail.
And remember a lot of this is just basic common sense. The main problem people get caught up with is simply the narrative of TRP. It's too easy to be put off with misogynistic phrases, or assume it's hatred of women, or that one segment they disagree with (ie PUA) is a large component of it instead of being just an aspect.
Siddar
Bronze Baronet of the Realm
- 6,463
- 6,011
Did your wife make you post that?
JK but its clear the two sides are simply talking past each other. Nether is being moved a single inch by what the otherside is saying.
The basic position the redpill is socially irresponsible is factually true. That most redpillers are from the lowend of the beta male population is also true. That marriage if it doesn't end in divorce is preferable to being single. Reppillers really don't disagree with any of that.
What you miss is that lowend beta males are expected to settle for lowend beta females and simply put the lowend beta female population is utterly terrible these days. Choosing to bang sluts instead of putting a ring on a fat crazy women you're in no way sexual attracted to seems like valid choice to that segment of the population. I would say for every redpiller out there with five women there dating at the same time that each of those women likely have fifteen boyfriends. You end up with the math of three redpill men one slut and while not seen by the others two spinster women sitting home alone. Those spinsters are the female version of the nice guys being told to change nothing just sit and wait tell your true love magically appears.
Much of what you see coming out of SJW crowd is simply a attempt to force culture back to making those lowend females Marriageable again with actually making the females change in anyway at all, reddit banning fatpeoplehate, antias anti sexism in videogames, fat acceptance there all part of a misguided plan to get the fatty women married off.
The lowend beta men are simply not going to go along with it because of high divorce rates a huge fat epidemic making people there supposed to settle for sexually unattractive and the basic fact that most people become fat in the first place because they have underlying mental problems.
Better to take care of yourself and bang sluts for as long as you can then to settle for whats on offer. Is doing so socially destructive to society? Of course it is but honestly this society needs to be burnt to the ground and be rebuilt anyway because it is simply failing to many members of it as it currently is.
JK but its clear the two sides are simply talking past each other. Nether is being moved a single inch by what the otherside is saying.
The basic position the redpill is socially irresponsible is factually true. That most redpillers are from the lowend of the beta male population is also true. That marriage if it doesn't end in divorce is preferable to being single. Reppillers really don't disagree with any of that.
What you miss is that lowend beta males are expected to settle for lowend beta females and simply put the lowend beta female population is utterly terrible these days. Choosing to bang sluts instead of putting a ring on a fat crazy women you're in no way sexual attracted to seems like valid choice to that segment of the population. I would say for every redpiller out there with five women there dating at the same time that each of those women likely have fifteen boyfriends. You end up with the math of three redpill men one slut and while not seen by the others two spinster women sitting home alone. Those spinsters are the female version of the nice guys being told to change nothing just sit and wait tell your true love magically appears.
Much of what you see coming out of SJW crowd is simply a attempt to force culture back to making those lowend females Marriageable again with actually making the females change in anyway at all, reddit banning fatpeoplehate, antias anti sexism in videogames, fat acceptance there all part of a misguided plan to get the fatty women married off.
The lowend beta men are simply not going to go along with it because of high divorce rates a huge fat epidemic making people there supposed to settle for sexually unattractive and the basic fact that most people become fat in the first place because they have underlying mental problems.
Better to take care of yourself and bang sluts for as long as you can then to settle for whats on offer. Is doing so socially destructive to society? Of course it is but honestly this society needs to be burnt to the ground and be rebuilt anyway because it is simply failing to many members of it as it currently is.
Pks, you are wrong. I have analyzed why these boys/men are caught up in this trap time after time. I just didn't touch on it in my post.
When you dilute marriage down to a sexual arrangement you don't take the time to evaluate the woman entirely. Is she having sexual with me and I like it? Yes. Is she not as annoying as my last girlfriend? Yes. Is she attractive enough? Yes. And that's about it .... Marry her.
It isn't coincidence that the further we get away from old fashioned dating and all of that we notice that these marriages are terrible. When you pick up some random broad from a bar after seven drinks and she is stumbling drunk into your apartment to have sex with you the first night there are probably self worth issues and a lot of other problems. Doesn't mean she is instantly a terrible person or that I am slut shaming. It means you already started with both of you at a negative balance when it comes to decision making. You then don't care because you are getting sex so you continue along.
Now put in technology and tinder and match and all the lies involved in that. Think about how one sided most of that is where a specific app might only care about picture only or one specific to a single hobby you share.
Take the time to get to know a person and to ensure they know you. Don't change who you are at all because eventually you will revert. Be who you are and find out who she is and make your decision based entirely on that.
When you dilute marriage down to a sexual arrangement you don't take the time to evaluate the woman entirely. Is she having sexual with me and I like it? Yes. Is she not as annoying as my last girlfriend? Yes. Is she attractive enough? Yes. And that's about it .... Marry her.
It isn't coincidence that the further we get away from old fashioned dating and all of that we notice that these marriages are terrible. When you pick up some random broad from a bar after seven drinks and she is stumbling drunk into your apartment to have sex with you the first night there are probably self worth issues and a lot of other problems. Doesn't mean she is instantly a terrible person or that I am slut shaming. It means you already started with both of you at a negative balance when it comes to decision making. You then don't care because you are getting sex so you continue along.
Now put in technology and tinder and match and all the lies involved in that. Think about how one sided most of that is where a specific app might only care about picture only or one specific to a single hobby you share.
Take the time to get to know a person and to ensure they know you. Don't change who you are at all because eventually you will revert. Be who you are and find out who she is and make your decision based entirely on that.
Siddar
Bronze Baronet of the Realm
- 6,463
- 6,011
Did your wife make you post that Alkorin?
JK but its clear the two sides are simply talking past each other. Nether is being moved a single inch by what the otherside is saying.
The basic position that redpill is socially irresponsible is factually true. That most redpillers are from the lowend of the beta male population is also true. That marriage if it doesn't end in divorce is preferable to being single. Reppillers really don't disagree with any of that.
What you miss is that lowend beta males are expected to settle for lowend beta females and simply put the lowend beta female population is utterly terrible these days. Choosing to bang sluts instead of putting a ring on a fat crazy women you're in no way sexually attracted to seems like valid choice to that segment of the population. I would say for every redpiller out there dating five women at the same time that each of those women likely have fifteen boyfriends. You end up with the math of three redpill men, one slut, and while not seen by the others two spinster women sitting home alone. Those spinsters are the female version of the nice guys being told to change nothing just sit and wait tell your true love magically appears.
Much of what you see coming out of SJW crowd is simply a attempt to force the culture back to making those lowend females Marriageable again without actually making the females change in anyway at all, Reddit banning fatpeoplehate, antias anti sexism in videogames, fat acceptance there all part of a misguided plan to get the fatty women married off.
The lowend beta men are simply not going to go along with it because of high divorce rates a huge fat epidemic making the people there supposed to settle for sexually unattractive and the basic fact that most people become fat in the first place because they have underlying mental problems.
Better to take care of yourself and bang sluts for as long as you can then to settle for whats on offer. Is doing so socially destructive to society? Of course it is but honestly this society needs to be burnt to the ground and be rebuilt anyway because it is simply failing to many members of it as it currently is.
Oh and no edit in shaw sucks.
JK but its clear the two sides are simply talking past each other. Nether is being moved a single inch by what the otherside is saying.
The basic position that redpill is socially irresponsible is factually true. That most redpillers are from the lowend of the beta male population is also true. That marriage if it doesn't end in divorce is preferable to being single. Reppillers really don't disagree with any of that.
What you miss is that lowend beta males are expected to settle for lowend beta females and simply put the lowend beta female population is utterly terrible these days. Choosing to bang sluts instead of putting a ring on a fat crazy women you're in no way sexually attracted to seems like valid choice to that segment of the population. I would say for every redpiller out there dating five women at the same time that each of those women likely have fifteen boyfriends. You end up with the math of three redpill men, one slut, and while not seen by the others two spinster women sitting home alone. Those spinsters are the female version of the nice guys being told to change nothing just sit and wait tell your true love magically appears.
Much of what you see coming out of SJW crowd is simply a attempt to force the culture back to making those lowend females Marriageable again without actually making the females change in anyway at all, Reddit banning fatpeoplehate, antias anti sexism in videogames, fat acceptance there all part of a misguided plan to get the fatty women married off.
The lowend beta men are simply not going to go along with it because of high divorce rates a huge fat epidemic making the people there supposed to settle for sexually unattractive and the basic fact that most people become fat in the first place because they have underlying mental problems.
Better to take care of yourself and bang sluts for as long as you can then to settle for whats on offer. Is doing so socially destructive to society? Of course it is but honestly this society needs to be burnt to the ground and be rebuilt anyway because it is simply failing to many members of it as it currently is.
Oh and no edit in shaw sucks.
Eidal
Molten Core Raider
- 2,001
- 213
Lol; neckbeards and bluehairs deserve each other. Both genders look terrible as you track downward on whatever bell curve you want to use.
Siddar
Bronze Baronet of the Realm
- 6,463
- 6,011
Damn, you started to yet again write a good post regarding the nature of relationships or marriage. But then you go and ruin it again with this false tenet: "Just be yourself".
That has to be some of the worst advice you could offer someone. But as I said, I suspected you of not being able to relate to the common man who fails with regards to women. From the outside, you know these guys are failing and you can see why they fail, (and I apologise for assuming you didn't bother analysing based on your writings).
Regarding those military guys, do you think that advice would help them? 100% no, because they simply were in all likely hood just being themselves Naive, under equipped mentally, under prepared young men. They probably made the decision to marry them with the full intent that it was a good choice at the time to make. The great thing is that I assume they were all young, so hopefully the next time they encounter a relationship they'll be much better prepared with a ton of time on their side.
And that's not to say "pretend to be someone else", because TRP is not that at all. If being yourself is pretty much not working, you live an unhappy life, you don't have much luck with women etc... just continue being yourself?
Hold on, lets really look at that tiny part at the end: You'll find a girl and find out who she is and you have to just ... figure out shes not a harpy. Pretty easy for the guy on the outside who see shes got some slutparty life style or disrespects her man in public, but those guys have a preconditioning to accept women and to exalt them. To idolise them. They have no chance on figuring that out. Did you ever talk to any of those guys before they got married, and told them their fiance? was probably going to fuck him over? Did they not tell you that she's nothing like that and can't believe a word your saying? Just be yourself you told him?
Eidal
Molten Core Raider
- 2,001
- 213
Dandai
<WoW Guild Officer>
- 5,918
- 4,504
I'll admit that telling someone to "just be yourself" during the dating phase is bad advice. You have to sell yourself and be your own advocate. Everyone does something regularly that is going to be at least mildly off-putting to others, so if you just come out and say, "Nah, I'm not available Saturday because that's when my buddies and I sit around in our boxers all day, eat Doritos, suck down a case of Mountain Dew, and play LOL from when we wake up until we crash at 3AM." Yeah... you should probably highlight the things you are confident she'll like and downplay the stuff you're confident she won't.
You don't become someone else for the sake of a relationship, but you should expect to temper some of your extremes and be a good partner with the other person. Case in point: I fucking hate dogs. My wife fucking loves dogs. To me they're feedbags that eat money. To her they're children. We met halfway by having a couple dogs, but I have very minimal interaction with them. When she was showing them and doing agility courses with them, I would go with her to her shows to support her. She played EQ, WoW, and Vanguard with me for a while, even though (she admitted later) she wasn't really having a great time. She just wanted to get to know my hobbies and spend time with me.
The give and take is what's important for a healthy relationship. Some dudes seem to think that it's an all or nothing game, or follow the rigid guidelines a_skeleton_03 pointed out. No doubt that there's some chick out there that perfectly matches your criteria... but there are 3-4 billion women in the world, so the odds aren't exactly in your favor.
You don't become someone else for the sake of a relationship, but you should expect to temper some of your extremes and be a good partner with the other person. Case in point: I fucking hate dogs. My wife fucking loves dogs. To me they're feedbags that eat money. To her they're children. We met halfway by having a couple dogs, but I have very minimal interaction with them. When she was showing them and doing agility courses with them, I would go with her to her shows to support her. She played EQ, WoW, and Vanguard with me for a while, even though (she admitted later) she wasn't really having a great time. She just wanted to get to know my hobbies and spend time with me.
The give and take is what's important for a healthy relationship. Some dudes seem to think that it's an all or nothing game, or follow the rigid guidelines a_skeleton_03 pointed out. No doubt that there's some chick out there that perfectly matches your criteria... but there are 3-4 billion women in the world, so the odds aren't exactly in your favor.
Siddar
Bronze Baronet of the Realm
- 6,463
- 6,011
Between 25% and 30% of US population will never have children.Natural selection?
You only have to sell yourself and not actually be yourself if you are picking shallow women is the point.
You date women that fit your natural personality and you will go far. Changing yourself into someone else isn't going to last so you are just basically lighting the fuse that will end your marriage when she finally figures out you aren't who she thought you were or you just get tired of the sham.
You are literally your worst enemy just setting yourself up for failure. If you aren't dating vapid and shallow women you don't need to be a shallow fake yourself.
You date women that fit your natural personality and you will go far. Changing yourself into someone else isn't going to last so you are just basically lighting the fuse that will end your marriage when she finally figures out you aren't who she thought you were or you just get tired of the sham.
You are literally your worst enemy just setting yourself up for failure. If you aren't dating vapid and shallow women you don't need to be a shallow fake yourself.
I hear people repeat that garbage about "don't show her yourself hanging out in boxers covered in Doritos dust" all the time.
If that is ALL you are there is a problem. If that is who you are sometimes and she happens to see it and freaks out, she has a problem.
Being yourself doesn't mean pick a time when you are at your worst and be that guy all the time. It means be natural, show her every aspect of you that you can. Sometimes I am quite charming with my wife, sometimes I call her in to see a monster shit I took before I flush it. Both times it is me that she sees and even though they are opposite they are me.
I didn't show her my shit while dating but I also didn't cancel on friends if she decided she wasn't interested in hanging with them. I was always genuine.
*Life Hack* - If you are too embarrassed to be who you are in public then change yourself for yourself but never for everyone else. If you are just doing it to get laid or to date better women the natural you will eventually come out.
If that is ALL you are there is a problem. If that is who you are sometimes and she happens to see it and freaks out, she has a problem.
Being yourself doesn't mean pick a time when you are at your worst and be that guy all the time. It means be natural, show her every aspect of you that you can. Sometimes I am quite charming with my wife, sometimes I call her in to see a monster shit I took before I flush it. Both times it is me that she sees and even though they are opposite they are me.
I didn't show her my shit while dating but I also didn't cancel on friends if she decided she wasn't interested in hanging with them. I was always genuine.
*Life Hack* - If you are too embarrassed to be who you are in public then change yourself for yourself but never for everyone else. If you are just doing it to get laid or to date better women the natural you will eventually come out.
Nester
Vyemm Raider
- 4,980
- 3,185
Your halfway there imo !
Be Yourself, but be the best damn version of yourself! Totally agree with not highlighting the bad stuff, but dont take it to the other extreme of being fake and pretending to be interested in shit your not etc...
Dandai
<WoW Guild Officer>
- 5,918
- 4,504
I'll cosign this improvement.
When I was a pre-teen and first started paying attention to girls I would ask my dad endless [annoying] questions about how to talk to them, how to get them to like me, etc. He gave me essentially the same advice - always point out things you like, and don't talk about things you think could be better. ESPECIALLY don't lie about what you like, because you will always get caught in the lie.
I'm sure he made his example PG for my benefit (I couldn't have been older than 12 or 13), but he said, "Never tell a girl you like something - like her eyes - if you don't. One day you'll be talking to her and compliment her hair and she'll say, 'But I thought you liked my eyes?' and you're caught. She'll think you're a liar, and she won't want to talk to you."
Ok, so the memory is lame, but I'm buzzed and waxing nostalgic. Sue me.
a_skeleton_03, I think you're full of shit. You just have this massive disconnect between where you are at, and where average Joe is at. And you're advice to be yourself is so retarded that I think you subconsciously just want less competition out there, so you offer shitty advice.
Okay, take person A. Mr Joe.
A is a chump, 40lb's or more overweight, no muscles, bad posture from slouching, hasn't taken care of his teeth well, probably has a rotting nerve so his breathe gets bad, doesn't have a good default audible voice because he mutters and almost whispers some words in monotone ways, appears outwardly anxious at the same time and constantly fails to look people in the eye. He'll just be average Joe. He's not had much luck in the dating scene - tindr/okc he's in the bottom 10% due to his average looks and boring profile. Women he approaches (if ever) don't know how to react and talk to him when out, so, he strikes out more often than not.
Personality wise, he might be interesting. Charming, good to have a laugh or a beer with. Hell if a woman out there can figure that out though in the time it takes to meet and greet.
He's not happy, but he has his hobbies, he's got friends. Just doesn't have the wife yet, but you know he might be earning enough in 5 years that he'll reckon some girl will just settle for him. And hey, that's what works for a lot of guys. Just being settled for and not having a great relationship. If he's really lucky, she might be better than average looking.
Good advice for this guy? "Just be yourself".
Ok bro.
Ok.
How about the following?
"GO TO THE FUCKING GYM. GET SOME CORE MUSCLES.". Just shedding 40lb of fat, adding 40lb of muscle, adding core strength and wahay suddenly this guy starts to stand a bit taller, less slouching. He suddenly just has a bit more confidence based on being more fucking testosterone fueled, his general health is way better at the same time. Mentally he'll just be sharper. Maybe one weekend he visits the dentist, gets a whitening job and a root canal. He then goes and takes some time and listens to how he talks, figures out half the time he can't even understand himself so he works on voice projection. All at the same time, he just naturally starts to look at people in the eye without realising, he gradually fills out his personal space with a bigger aura.
And what else? His personality! It's improved. People like those traits in a guy, men and women alike. Confidence is a great social drug. He's not faking shit here. He'll have more confidence for everything and that shit just bleeds into every part of your life and improves it. Professionally, physically, mentally, sexually.
Has his guy suddenly upped his sexual market value? Hell yes. Is he now getting more swipes on his dating app, getting more interesting conversations with the women he meets? Hell yea. And guess what, he's still himself. Just way better.
Even if he's STILL not getting laid he's going to be way better off than he was before. Maybe he's still not closing any deals with women however. He could go further and learn some basic game. It shouldn't be crazy PUA / speed seduction / NLP / mystery method etc, just general 'how to not fall into traps (ie shit tests)', how to read the signals being presented. THIS IS NOT FAKING. This is just learning social interaction with the opposite sex. If you have to rely on PUA stuff to get laid, then you're still faking it to a certain level. PUA stuff itself is still a useful thing to understand however, because it uses a lot of psychology and understanding of it (to cheat it).
When you meet new people, there is a subtle negotiation always going on. Half the time she's trying to figure out if you are a rapist. The other half she's figuring out how you react, how you hold up. She asks you some shitty question like how many people you've slept with, honesty here isn't going to help. She doesn't actually want honesty, so why give it? You're still 'being yourself' when you tell her "I lost count when I was a teenager" with a cocky grin. This isn't faking or lying, it's just having fun and giving her a response that doesn't red flag you or make you look weak. Social 101. When she wants an honest answer, she'll ask you during your long term relationship if it gets to that.
tl;dr = a_skeleton_03 full of shit, being yourself can just be a pile advice of shit for average Joe. Either he gets weeded out of society genetically, or he strikes out lucky when he's over 30 and lands some woman who wants to settle down for him. Hopefully she doesn't cockold him or keep his dick in a jar. How about you flip that script and make Average Joe into Awesome Joe, whilst never faking anything. He'll just have a better life, with or without women. And with women, he'll just get way more chances for his personality to shine.
Okay, take person A. Mr Joe.
A is a chump, 40lb's or more overweight, no muscles, bad posture from slouching, hasn't taken care of his teeth well, probably has a rotting nerve so his breathe gets bad, doesn't have a good default audible voice because he mutters and almost whispers some words in monotone ways, appears outwardly anxious at the same time and constantly fails to look people in the eye. He'll just be average Joe. He's not had much luck in the dating scene - tindr/okc he's in the bottom 10% due to his average looks and boring profile. Women he approaches (if ever) don't know how to react and talk to him when out, so, he strikes out more often than not.
Personality wise, he might be interesting. Charming, good to have a laugh or a beer with. Hell if a woman out there can figure that out though in the time it takes to meet and greet.
He's not happy, but he has his hobbies, he's got friends. Just doesn't have the wife yet, but you know he might be earning enough in 5 years that he'll reckon some girl will just settle for him. And hey, that's what works for a lot of guys. Just being settled for and not having a great relationship. If he's really lucky, she might be better than average looking.
Good advice for this guy? "Just be yourself".
Ok bro.
Ok.
How about the following?
"GO TO THE FUCKING GYM. GET SOME CORE MUSCLES.". Just shedding 40lb of fat, adding 40lb of muscle, adding core strength and wahay suddenly this guy starts to stand a bit taller, less slouching. He suddenly just has a bit more confidence based on being more fucking testosterone fueled, his general health is way better at the same time. Mentally he'll just be sharper. Maybe one weekend he visits the dentist, gets a whitening job and a root canal. He then goes and takes some time and listens to how he talks, figures out half the time he can't even understand himself so he works on voice projection. All at the same time, he just naturally starts to look at people in the eye without realising, he gradually fills out his personal space with a bigger aura.
And what else? His personality! It's improved. People like those traits in a guy, men and women alike. Confidence is a great social drug. He's not faking shit here. He'll have more confidence for everything and that shit just bleeds into every part of your life and improves it. Professionally, physically, mentally, sexually.
Has his guy suddenly upped his sexual market value? Hell yes. Is he now getting more swipes on his dating app, getting more interesting conversations with the women he meets? Hell yea. And guess what, he's still himself. Just way better.
Even if he's STILL not getting laid he's going to be way better off than he was before. Maybe he's still not closing any deals with women however. He could go further and learn some basic game. It shouldn't be crazy PUA / speed seduction / NLP / mystery method etc, just general 'how to not fall into traps (ie shit tests)', how to read the signals being presented. THIS IS NOT FAKING. This is just learning social interaction with the opposite sex. If you have to rely on PUA stuff to get laid, then you're still faking it to a certain level. PUA stuff itself is still a useful thing to understand however, because it uses a lot of psychology and understanding of it (to cheat it).
When you meet new people, there is a subtle negotiation always going on. Half the time she's trying to figure out if you are a rapist. The other half she's figuring out how you react, how you hold up. She asks you some shitty question like how many people you've slept with, honesty here isn't going to help. She doesn't actually want honesty, so why give it? You're still 'being yourself' when you tell her "I lost count when I was a teenager" with a cocky grin. This isn't faking or lying, it's just having fun and giving her a response that doesn't red flag you or make you look weak. Social 101. When she wants an honest answer, she'll ask you during your long term relationship if it gets to that.
tl;dr = a_skeleton_03 full of shit, being yourself can just be a pile advice of shit for average Joe. Either he gets weeded out of society genetically, or he strikes out lucky when he's over 30 and lands some woman who wants to settle down for him. Hopefully she doesn't cockold him or keep his dick in a jar. How about you flip that script and make Average Joe into Awesome Joe, whilst never faking anything. He'll just have a better life, with or without women. And with women, he'll just get way more chances for his personality to shine.