Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker

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Frenzied Wombat

Potato del Grande
14,730
31,803
Whenever I looked at Kylo all I saw was some emo fag that plowed Lena Dunham on Girls. Lena Dunham herself would have been a more fearsome Sith Lord. Just another example of how they managed to get the casting for the entire series wrong. Even absent the previous imagery, Kylo looks like and acts like some whiny fag. Fin is a poor man's ethnic Solo, Rey about as intimidating as your local hairdresser, and Poe? I don't even know what the fuck he was there for.

I never thought they could manage to make the Lucas remakes look good, but they are practically awesome in comparison to this shite. At least you had some great saber battles with Dookoo and Darth Maul.

Another thing I noticed about this movie is that there was zero tension. Action scenes were basically a shooting duck gallery on rails as our stalwart heroes just shoot and slice their way through everything without a scratch A-Team style.
 
  • 5Like
Reactions: 4 users

Hoss

Make America's Team Great Again
<Gold Donor>
27,231
15,365
Only was familiar with it as a kid once, one foster home were Mormons. Guess I got the extended special edition, with full DVD features, kinda Bible reading.

Still all better fiction than this trilogy, even with all the plotholes and contradictions.

Yeah, you got the version with dewbacks and greedo shooting first.
 
  • 1Worf
Reactions: 1 user

Lumi

Vyemm Raider
4,310
3,041


This guy is pretty hilarious. The one he does for season 8 GoT is amazing too.
 
  • 3Like
Reactions: 2 users

Fucker

Log Wizard
12,639
28,767
Was one of the things that annoyed me the most about Ren. He was awful at being a jedi, sith, or anything resembling being adept with the force, aside from random forced plot situations where he does something "powerful". Yet he was supposedly the #2 dark force user in the galaxy (before knowing about palps), and leader of a group of dark force users to boot. I at least figured in the 2nd movie, the rift between him and Luke would have happened when he was a punk 12 year old or something, explain why he seemed so untrained & snotty, but nope hes pretty much grown in the flashback.

He's Uncles lazy shitbird nephew that didn't learn a damn thing, but Uncle is a softtouch when it comes to family, is my explanation.

At the end, the lesson I'm getting from this trilogy is: it's perfectly ok to act like a snotty spoiled little cunt for years, all the while LARPing being an evil dude, murder your dad, come very close to murdering your mother, all because your religious uncle knew you were a little fucking faggot, and briefly considered doing the universe a favor, but changed his mind, before you flipped the fuck out and murdered a bunch of kids, proved him right, and ran away. Then for one single day you decide to do the right thing and grow the fuck up, and suddenly everything is perfectly cool, you are one of the heroes in the end. That's one hell of a Disney ending.

And to top it all off, they gave him a Sith Jr. helmet that made him look like an Imperial Meter Maid.
 
  • 1Like
Reactions: 1 user

Vanessa

Uncle Tanya
<Banned>
7,689
1,417
Today is nerd day, woopedy doo!

Feels like 05/04 is more of a funeral than a jovial day based around a pun. Well done KK.

tenor (4).gif
 
  • 3Solidarity
Reactions: 2 users

Vanessa

Uncle Tanya
<Banned>
7,689
1,417
That'd be funny if someone got a bunch of beta-looking dudes together wearing t-shirts that say "The Fourth Is Female" and twitter bombed all the Star Wars execs the pic.
 
  • 3Like
Reactions: 2 users

Brikker

Trump's Staff
6,296
4,833
Gonna watch this shit since it's on disney+ now and 4k. Least it's free and I can drink some scotch during it.
 

Kovaks

Mr. Poopybutthole
2,358
3,147
Gonna watch this shit since it's on disney+ now and 4k. Least it's free and I can drink some scotch during it.
It is not free if you pay for D+, and it adds to their metrics to say look people watch it so they must like it... if you have to torture yourself at least do it responsibly and torrent it .
 
  • 5Like
Reactions: 4 users

Brikker

Trump's Staff
6,296
4,833
It is not free if you pay for D+, and it adds to their metrics to say look people watch it so they must like it... if you have to torture yourself at least do it responsibly and torrent it .

I've never torrented anything. I don't pay for D+ though. Pretty much just watching it to see the visuals.
 

Rhanyn

Blackwing Lair Raider
1,032
1,427
Finally got around to watching this on Disney+, and the best thing to come from this movie, is at least we know what kind of quality to expect when SyFy starts working with the Star Wars license.
 
  • 2Like
Reactions: 1 users

Mist

REEEEeyore
<Gold Donor>
31,201
23,388
Watching Spaceballs right now. So much better than any of this shit.

Spaceballs has a coherent plot and satisfying story arc.
 
  • 14Like
Reactions: 13 users

Aychamo BanBan

<Banned>
6,338
7,144
Whenever I looked at Kylo all I saw was some emo fag that plowed Lena Dunham on Girls. Lena Dunham herself would have been a more fearsome Sith Lord. Just another example of how they managed to get the casting for the entire series wrong. Even absent the previous imagery, Kylo looks like and acts like some whiny fag. Fin is a poor man's ethnic Solo, Rey about as intimidating as your local hairdresser, and Poe? I don't even know what the fuck he was there for.

I never thought they could manage to make the Lucas remakes look good, but they are practically awesome in comparison to this shite. At least you had some great saber battles with Dookoo and Darth Maul.

Another thing I noticed about this movie is that there was zero tension. Action scenes were basically a shooting duck gallery on rails as our stalwart heroes just shoot and slice their way through everything without a scratch A-Team style.

I got my dad to watch TFA. That was his main complaint, that Kylo looked like "some queer boy" haha.
 
  • 2Worf
  • 1Like
  • 1Solidarity
Reactions: 3 users

Sterling

El Presidente
13,092
8,067
Watching Spaceballs right now. So much better than any of this shit.

Spaceballs has a coherent plot and satisfying story arc.
Mel Brooks makes awesome movies in general, but Spaceballs is specifically great.
 
  • 4Like
Reactions: 3 users