Stephen King's The Dark Tower

Kiroy

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Dang, that looks awesome as fuck!

I thought it looked stupid as fuck.

And Roland is now black so they can cast Susanna as white in future movies, and have her racist side be N this and N that, instead of honkey this and honkey that. Cause reasons.
 
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Chukzombi

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i would say this trailer raped my childhood as i started reading this series when i was 14, but godamn hollywood has been raping it so much at this point i am numb from all the atrocities being committed. they not only fucked the series, but they assraped Drawing Of The Three and The Wastelands. way to fucking go, guys, now they will never make a true adaption of this. fuck you motherfuckers.
 
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Royal

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Spoilered for size:

rg6g91wzv9my.jpg
 
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Campbell1oo4

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This is going to suck. Calling it now.

Some weird rehashing so that it's this action adventure with a teen sidekick who has to dig deep from within himself to build up the resolve to beat the bad guy at the end.
 
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elidib

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I thought it looked stupid as fuck.

And Roland is now black so they can cast Susanna as white in future movies, and have her racist side be N this and N that, instead of honkey this and honkey that. Cause reasons.

No way will hollywood actually have the balls to do that. They will overhaul susannah's character, mark my words. The overt racism will be gone, replaced with more subtle, thinly veiled allusions to racism, or more likely, some backstory where she just hates men in general, probably due to some validated reason like she was raped or abused by a husband.
 

Intrinsic

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Didn't they already say this will supplement tDT and not be an adaptation? So what Detta does won't even be relevant because that won't be covered? She'll just be regular. I haven't really kept up with this though. Figure the best bet is keep expectations very low in hopes of being mostly entertaining.
 

Arbitrary

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Didn't they already say this will supplement tDT and not be an adaptation? So what Detta does won't even be relevant because that won't be covered? She'll just be regular. I haven't really kept up with this though. Figure the best bet is keep expectations very low in hopes of being mostly entertaining.

Stephen King tweeted a photo of the Horn of Arthur Eld with the caption of "One Last Time Around" or something like that.

The movie or movies is the final journey. Also, if I ever saw Stephen King in real life I'd yell insane sperg fan gibberish at him about how much he sucks.
 
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Kiroy

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Didn't they already say this will supplement tDT and not be an adaptation? So what Detta does won't even be relevant because that won't be covered? She'll just be regular. I haven't really kept up with this though. Figure the best bet is keep expectations very low in hopes of being mostly entertaining.

It resets, with what we have to assume are minor permutations (or power ups?) every reset. This could be rolands 1000 time through, although since he has the horn we've got to assume it's the last book reset.

Honestly these retards should have just turned book 5 into a movie (his childhood with friends and girlfriend), that was the strongest book in the series after the 1st.
 
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Arbitrary

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Seven long-ass books for a derp ending revealing to us that the more interesting story was one that King wasn't even going to tell.

Sorry kids, your princess is in another castle.
 
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Arden

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It resets, with what we have to assume are minor permutations (or power ups?) every reset. This could be rolands 1000 time through, although since he has the horn we've got to assume it's the last book reset.

Honestly these retards should have just turned book 5 into a movie (his childhood with friends and girlfriend), that was the strongest book in the series after the 1st.

Wizard and Glass was the 4th book- and yeah, the story he tells in that book about young Roland, his friends, and Susan is one of the better things King has ever written.
 
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Chukzombi

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It resets, with what we have to assume are minor permutations (or power ups?) every reset. This could be rolands 1000 time through, although since he has the horn we've got to assume it's the last book reset.

Honestly these retards should have just turned book 5 into a movie (his childhood with friends and girlfriend), that was the strongest book in the series after the 1st.
The Wastelands is by far the best of them all with Drawing Of The Three a close second and Gunslinger in third. and there is no way this is going to be just a reusing of the same characters in different situations. there are a wealth of iconic moments from the series they cant pass up or would be fucking retarded to do so. this will likely cliff notes the entire 7 book series in 3 movies with absolutely no crossover characters or references to King's earlier work. i also fully expect there to be no young King cameo in this. what i do expect is After Earth meets Clint Eastwood.

if these studios were smart, they would build an entire Stephen King Cinematic Universe revolving around the DT books and this way they can adapt all the crossovers. that means we get fucking The Talisman, we get fucking Insomnia and we get fucking The Eyes of The Dragon.
The Dark Tower - Connections
 
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Arbitrary

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It always bothered me that he blew up his own multiverse by making some of his stories double fictional. In the multiverse that Roland inhabits there is a book called Insomnia. That book is "thin." It was written by a King about the Dark Tower but it is not a story of events that exactly happened. Salem's Lot? That shit happened like it happened.

I prefer everything being connected without the additional layer, without including King or Kings as characters writing about the Dark Tower, and all the extra meta-fiction. It always, always cheapened the whole thing for me.
 

Chukzombi

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It always bothered me that he blew up his own multiverse by making some of his stories double fictional. In the multiverse that Roland inhabits there is a book called Insomnia. That book is "thin." It was written by a King about the Dark Tower but it is not a story of events that exactly happened. Salem's Lot? That shit happened like it happened.

I prefer everything being connected without the additional layer, without including King or Kings as characters writing about the Dark Tower, and all the extra meta-fiction. It always, always cheapened the whole thing for me.
agreed, but i did like the trip they took to Maine and some of the stuff that happened like with those ghost sightings and the floating truck. in the online SK community at the time , people were shitting themselves over King adding himself in there, i agreed it wasnt necessary, but i liked other stuff that came with it so i gave it a pass.
 

Arbitrary

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agreed, but i did like the trip they took to Maine and some of the stuff that happened like with those ghost sightings and the floating truck. in the SK community people shit themselved over King adding himself in there, i agreed it wasnt necessary, but i liked other stuff that came with it so i gave it a pass.

I thought that King adding King as a character was done better than really anyone could have hoped. It wasn't ever eyeroll to me. I was much more bothered with the other ramifications.

I've only read the series once but do you remember the two characters, one named Tower, that started a corporation that hunted for connections in Stephen King works to the Dark Tower and had modern-day gunslingers? That always, always felt like a bit of a dig at his audience for paying attention to the references he himself put in. Look, I've got in my books a group that spergs over the shit I write just like you guys do!

Boy I am still salty about these fucking things after all this time. I blame it on reading them when I was young. George R.R. Martin shit all over himself and even though I really like Game of Thrones for the most part I just don't give a fuck if he ever finishes the thing. King I'm still pissy about.
 

Chukzombi

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I thought that King adding King as a character was done better than really anyone could have hoped. It wasn't ever eyeroll to me. I was much more bothered with the other ramifications.

I've only read the series once but do you remember the two characters, one named Tower, that started a corporation that hunted for connections in Stephen King works to the Dark Tower and had modern-day gunslingers? That always, always felt like a bit of a dig at his audience for paying attention to the references he himself put in. Look, I've got in my books a group that spergs over the shit I write just like you guys do!

Boy I am still salty about these fucking things after all this time. I blame it on reading them when I was young. George R.R. Martin shit all over himself and even though I really like Game of Thrones for the most part I just don't give a fuck if he ever finishes the thing. King I'm still pissy about.
yeah, that was stupid. gotta keep in mind this was after king nearly died and i think he was trying to find himself and connecting all these easter eggs was his way of summarizing his career. the Tower corp was probably something he imagined people would do to keep his name alive. in the end it was no big thing for me. i just wanted the story to end well, which it didnt, but at least the story did sort of have an ending kinda. GRRM is never going to finish his shit and we will have to live with fucking HBO telling his tale for him. pretty sad because the writers of GoT clearly stopped giving a shit about his world the last two seasons.