Vasectomy Inc
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Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
Go here and give us your nominations!Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!
Gavinmad
Mr. Poopybutthole
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I guess the english language is hard for chicks, cause I said a clothed pic. Hurr durr reading is hard when you have boobs instead of brains.
If I can break from my obnoxious troll persona for a moment, no, I don't think that's too young to be considering a vasectomy, especially when you already have 3 children. One of the perks of a vasectomy is that, in addition to being safer than a woman having her tubes tied, it's also easily reversible. So if a couple years down the road you decide you want to push a few more screaming brats out of that clown car you call a vagina, or if your husband leaves you when your body goes to shit in another couple years and wants to stop shooting blanks, he just goes back in to the doctor and has his manhood restored.
I guess I couldn't break from trolling, but god damnit I tried my best.
If I can break from my obnoxious troll persona for a moment, no, I don't think that's too young to be considering a vasectomy, especially when you already have 3 children. One of the perks of a vasectomy is that, in addition to being safer than a woman having her tubes tied, it's also easily reversible. So if a couple years down the road you decide you want to push a few more screaming brats out of that clown car you call a vagina, or if your husband leaves you when your body goes to shit in another couple years and wants to stop shooting blanks, he just goes back in to the doctor and has his manhood restored.
I guess I couldn't break from trolling, but god damnit I tried my best.
chaos
Buzzfeed Editor
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My wife had to get her tubes tied. It is kind of a different situation though, if she gets pregnant again it could be dangerous. But I am 32 and was going to get a vasectomy if she hadn't gotten the tubal so, no I don't think it is too young. Especially vasectomy. They have these new plastic clip things that are supposed to be more easily reversible if you change your kinds later.
As a guy, no way I'd ever get this done. Ever. Just doesn't interest me. Something about being a guy and all. Logical fallacy and all, because I'd be all for the chick getting her tubes tied once we had enough, but stay away from my baby batter.
Aaron
Goonsquad Officer
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Ok I have a few questions here about vasectomies:
1. I take it from what little I've read that having one prevents semen from entering the peehole and thereby shooting out your dick when you see a nice set of titties, right?
2. If true, does this mean that if I get nipped in the bud that jacking off and/or sex is a thing of the past?
3. Will it become impossible to get an orgasm, even if I lie in bend and fantasize about being lindz's husband after she's been a bad, bad girl and needs to be punished?
4. If one does orgasm, what happens to the semen? Where does it go? Does it enter my bloodstream until one day instead of getting nosebleeds, cum leaks from my nose?
5. If the semen doesn't leave the balls, what happens to the semen production, does it just stop or does it continue to collect up in my balls until they explode one day while watching the news and cover the TV, sofa, coffee table, my mom and my cat in hot man sauce?
BTW these are all serious, legitimate questions, even if they are put forth in an unconventional way.
1. I take it from what little I've read that having one prevents semen from entering the peehole and thereby shooting out your dick when you see a nice set of titties, right?
2. If true, does this mean that if I get nipped in the bud that jacking off and/or sex is a thing of the past?
3. Will it become impossible to get an orgasm, even if I lie in bend and fantasize about being lindz's husband after she's been a bad, bad girl and needs to be punished?
4. If one does orgasm, what happens to the semen? Where does it go? Does it enter my bloodstream until one day instead of getting nosebleeds, cum leaks from my nose?
5. If the semen doesn't leave the balls, what happens to the semen production, does it just stop or does it continue to collect up in my balls until they explode one day while watching the news and cover the TV, sofa, coffee table, my mom and my cat in hot man sauce?
BTW these are all serious, legitimate questions, even if they are put forth in an unconventional way.
Gavinmad
Mr. Poopybutthole
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chaos
Buzzfeed Editor
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The bottom line is that it is a major surgery for her and an outpatient procedure for you. She could die.
^This.
If you look at the risks of both procedures, you'll quickly realize what a dick move it would be to make the woman get a tubal litigation instead of just getting a vasectomy. It is major surgery for her, and a 15 minute procedure (with a few days soreness, by all accounts) for you.
Cutlery
Kill All the White People
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Dis
Confirmed Male
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Had one, went smooth. The "no cut" vas.
Worst part of the actual process was the local anesthetic. He had to shoot up my balls with what seemed like 100 injections. In the meantime, the doc is trying to talk about cars and shit with me because I told him what I do for a living:
Doc: Yea I looked at a Lexus recently, my neighbor got an LS400
Me: We have a LEXUS DEALERSHIP in houston if YOU WANT TO look at some cars. I can GIVE YOU A NUMBER of a good guy there who wiLL SHOOT STRAIGHT with you.
Doc: Thanks, does this hurt
Me: Srsly?
Anyways, other than that went smooth. Take it easy the first two days, and really the week. Took two days off, and went back to work where I just sat around in my chair mostly. Popped a lot of Aleve. Was all better after 7 days or so. One last thing, you have to really work at getting all the excess sperm, so either have a lot of sex (with/using birth control) when the doc says you can, and/or jerk it like you are 13 years old. You have to test to make sure your sterile twice (I believe 60 days for the first, and 30 days after the first test)
Worst part of the actual process was the local anesthetic. He had to shoot up my balls with what seemed like 100 injections. In the meantime, the doc is trying to talk about cars and shit with me because I told him what I do for a living:
Doc: Yea I looked at a Lexus recently, my neighbor got an LS400
Me: We have a LEXUS DEALERSHIP in houston if YOU WANT TO look at some cars. I can GIVE YOU A NUMBER of a good guy there who wiLL SHOOT STRAIGHT with you.
Doc: Thanks, does this hurt
Me: Srsly?
Anyways, other than that went smooth. Take it easy the first two days, and really the week. Took two days off, and went back to work where I just sat around in my chair mostly. Popped a lot of Aleve. Was all better after 7 days or so. One last thing, you have to really work at getting all the excess sperm, so either have a lot of sex (with/using birth control) when the doc says you can, and/or jerk it like you are 13 years old. You have to test to make sure your sterile twice (I believe 60 days for the first, and 30 days after the first test)
Pasteton
Blackwing Lair Raider
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There's another procedure women can get where they have these tubes inserted into their..tubes to block them. I forget what the procedure is called, and not sure on it's safety/effectiveness profile. I am pretty sure it is done more often in Europe than here. I am fairly confident though that it is much safer than a tubal ligation and more on par with the vasectomy as far as procedure and recovery..if anything should be quicker since there is no actual incision..the obgyn uses a hysteroscope (I think) to find and then place coils directly into the Fallopian tubes
iannis
Musty Nester
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28/30 isn't too young. Not when you already have children. And yes, it's safer for him to have it done for a few reasons.
Plus if you get preggers again he doesn't have to actually wait to see if it comes out black!
It's the wondering, nervous anticipation, and the self doubt -- that's the worst part.
Plus if you get preggers again he doesn't have to actually wait to see if it comes out black!
It's the wondering, nervous anticipation, and the self doubt -- that's the worst part.
iannis
Musty Nester
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1) Yep. That's exactly what it does.
2) Nope, your pee pee still works.
3) You just shoot blanks.
4) It goes the same place it always goes. Your balls are producing spermies 24/7, and recycling spermies 24/7. It's the entire circle of life right down there in your nads.
5) Sperm production continues. Over time the body adjusts to produce less -- but this happens naturally even without obstructing the duct.
Your balls don't actually care that much how often you shoot. They're gonna do what they do because that's what they do. They've got a quota to fill, and they ain't paid to work no overtime.
Arcanaloth
Golden Knight of the Realm
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Vandyn, what type of hernia did you have repaired?
I have had both right and left inguinal hernia repairs (not at the same time, however). A vasectomy is not even within the same realm as those, both in terms of recovery and performance related side effects. As many others have mentioned, the vasectomy typically has some very light lingering pain with potentially moderate swelling. Nothing that some anti-inflammatories and a bag of frozen peas won't take care of. I was on my feet and back to normal the next day. No performance side effects whatsoever.
Compared to recovery from the hernia repair(s): more downtime, "real" pain as opposed to "nuisance" pain that took hard painkillers to manage, and an extended period of time before resuming anything that I would consider normal activity. Performance related side effects? Before, I could have been a Peter North stand in. After, there is ZERO horsepower. It's a tragic fate.
TLDR: The two aren't even in the same ballpark, in my experience. Hope this helps.
Pasteton
Blackwing Lair Raider
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People who've had vasectomies tend to develop these large versions of these things called 'spermatoceles' near their testes, which I am not totally sure of the mechanism but is probably related to the vas ligation. They are quite common even in a normal population, but tend to be larger and more numerous, and thus more likely to be felt as some kind of scrotal lump in a post-vasectomy patient. I am not sure if they are known to cause any symptoms/pain though, outside of maybe some mental discomfort from their presence.
Pasteton
Blackwing Lair Raider
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Ok found more info on the device I was mentioning early. Less invasive than a vasectomy; possible option for the particularly lazy/cowardly dudes out there. In all reality though both procedures are very minor with negligible recovery.
http://www.medicinenet.com/script/ma...ticlekey=21688
The US Food and Drug Administration (FDA) has approved the use of tiny coils to sterilize women. These coils can be placed in a woman's fallopian tubes without an abdominal incision or general anesthesia. Once in place, the coils induce the formation of scar tissue and then permanent infertility. A woman should only opt for this method of birth control if she does not wish to have any children in the future.
http://www.medicinenet.com/script/ma...ticlekey=21688
The US Food and Drug Administration (FDA) has approved the use of tiny coils to sterilize women. These coils can be placed in a woman's fallopian tubes without an abdominal incision or general anesthesia. Once in place, the coils induce the formation of scar tissue and then permanent infertility. A woman should only opt for this method of birth control if she does not wish to have any children in the future.
Havent Killed Since 1984
Golden Knight of the Realm
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I did it at 21 and with no kids. I was too young then and somewhat regret the decision.
lindz
#DDs
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What doctor would do that?
My ob/gyn mentioned that Essure method when I talked to her about vasectomy vs tubal ligation last year. She was willing to do Essure on me after I delivered but still recommended the vasectomy as the easier way to go.
Gavinmad
Mr. Poopybutthole
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What doctor would do a reversible procedure on an adult without a mental incapacity? I imagine any doctor who doesn't want to get sued. If you're old enough to die for your country, throw your vote away in the presidential election, and drink alcohol, you're old enough to make decisions about your body.What doctor would do that?
My ob/gyn mentioned that Essure method when I talked to her about vasectomy vs tubal ligation last year. She was willing to do Essure on me after I delivered but still recommended the vasectomy as the easier way to go.
Unless you think 21 is also too young to decide to get a sex change, or plastic surgery, or a host of other elective procedures?