I was gonna say that after having 3 kids, he was probably just wanted to have the excuse of not wanting to risk more kids, so he wouldn't have to sleep with you anymore now that you're all fat and nasty from 3 pregnancies. But then you posted your picture. I'm sorry to say this, but your husband is a closet homosexual.
Vasectomy Inc
- Thread starter Adebisi
- Start date
-
Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
Go here and give us your nominations!Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!
fris
Vyemm Raider
- 2,158
- 2,477
just got back from Dr. Chopp. procedure was about 10 minutes. 2 shots to numb the area. 2nd area took 2 more shots as the 1st snip made my toes curl. seeing smoke rise from the cauterizing was a bit stomach churning. otherwise, small chitchat w/ the guy. getting it done on valentines day wasn't planned, just worked out that way. wife gave an amazing bj a few hours before. i'll report back later tonight or in a few days to see how the pain is.
i'm told to be a couch patato for at least 72 hours, should be easy. i can't get back to running for at least 7 days.
i'm told to be a couch patato for at least 72 hours, should be easy. i can't get back to running for at least 7 days.
Famm
Ahn'Qiraj Raider
- 11,041
- 794
fris
Vyemm Raider
- 2,158
- 2,477
they gave a zanax when i got there, which i guess was for nerves and not pain cause all it did was made me feel light headed. soon as the local wore off, i've been in a mild pain. when i got home, i drank a beer and immediately passed out. don't expect i'll get out of my lazy boy unless i have to. standing up straight is slightly uncomfortable. just took a vicodine, will consider another beer if i'm awake for more than 10 minutes.
i did get a slick shirt though
i did get a slick shirt though
- 26,235
- 39,956
Man Ive been telling my wife for the last 8yrs that I would get one just too chicken shit to do it. Ive been playing with fire too. Sometimes shit happens when we both get fucked up. But its worked for the last 8 yrs!
Ive heard tons of horror stories though, its pretty much 50/50 horror to NP wirth the people Ive talked to about it.
Ive heard tons of horror stories though, its pretty much 50/50 horror to NP wirth the people Ive talked to about it.
had mine done back in 2007. never had kids; just not for me.
i will say:
1) yes the local anesthesia was the worst part. while they were stickin needles in my sac, all i could think of was Joe Pesci's line from "Casino" where he talks about how "we even stuck ice picks in his balls."
2) dont know why, but my doctor wouldnt give me an anti anxiety med before the procedure, even though ive heard its fairly standard normally.
3) other than that, it went off without a hitch; never needed the vicodin they prescribed, just took some ibuprofen and kept my nuts iced 24/7 and i was good to go back to a job where i had some heavy lifting within a week. no complications, the good lord willing, since then.
i will say:
1) yes the local anesthesia was the worst part. while they were stickin needles in my sac, all i could think of was Joe Pesci's line from "Casino" where he talks about how "we even stuck ice picks in his balls."
2) dont know why, but my doctor wouldnt give me an anti anxiety med before the procedure, even though ive heard its fairly standard normally.
3) other than that, it went off without a hitch; never needed the vicodin they prescribed, just took some ibuprofen and kept my nuts iced 24/7 and i was good to go back to a job where i had some heavy lifting within a week. no complications, the good lord willing, since then.
thinkin bout getting one just so my girlfriend cant hit me with the trap, like this bitch did to my friend at work.
Adebisi
Clump of Cells
- 27,713
- 32,825
My doc said I have to bust about 20 or so nuts (40?) before my spooge reserves are fully drained. Should take a couple days and about 100 browsing tabs. Some aloe and a stack of towels.
Appointment set for April. He gave me 2 mg lorazepam to take before the procedure.
Appointment set for April. He gave me 2 mg lorazepam to take before the procedure.
Famm
Ahn'Qiraj Raider
- 11,041
- 794
Got my 10mg Valium already. He said to take it if I'm at all nervous about it, which yeah I'm fucking nervous about needles and scalpels and red hot fire in my sack....
Not a pill person at all, I'm guessing that's a tiny hit, but I'm half expecting to be totally loopy. Don't think I've ever taken a benzo in my life.
Not a pill person at all, I'm guessing that's a tiny hit, but I'm half expecting to be totally loopy. Don't think I've ever taken a benzo in my life.
I know, the info sheet I got says the residual sperm are gone after "15-20 ejaculations, typically six weeks". I was like uhhhh.....I might end up ahead of schedule on that one doc!
fris
Vyemm Raider
- 2,158
- 2,477
I don't get how some guys can be fully mobile in a day or 2. my op was thursday afternoon, it's now sunday afternoon and i still don't want to move. there's zero pain if you don't move at all. anything that uses your stomach muscles hurts though. it's almost like a hernia i guess?
my sack is twice it's normal size and mostly bruised in color. i'm having to be careful while surfing the net. hardons are painful and i don't want to catch sight of bobs in the screenshots forum.
my sack is twice it's normal size and mostly bruised in color. i'm having to be careful while surfing the net. hardons are painful and i don't want to catch sight of bobs in the screenshots forum.
Friday
Lord Nagafen Raider
- 870
- 104
Depending on your location the NAVY does vasectomy's at most treatment facilities. For the most part it's a simple outpatient procedure that can take 10-20 minutes for an experienced physician. The military can and will refuse your request for a vasectomy if you're like 20 years old and have no children and not married. In my clinic we could do 10 to 20 operations a day with 1 - 2 teaching doctors.
This is called a hemostat clamp. It can used to hold the sterile field together or to staunch bleeding. During one of our operations where the resident was being supervised by a provider he went to secure the clamp after having used it. Typically you secure it to the blue sterile field towels for re-use but he decided to secure it to the fleshy membrane of this patients scrotum. The patient's site was obviously numb from the local anesthetic. I guess he saw another doctor do it.
The attending physician flipped and made the resident clamp it to his nasal septum (that area between your nares). He performed the operation in tears and with a clamped septum like an oversize piercing. The attending lord over them so he had to parade around the other residents for his failure.
Anyways. Take the xanex / valium / smoke pot before the operation. Slight tugging sensations + a wheel chair ride to your car and ice pack for a few days. With luck you'll be shooting blanks in no time. In our facility it was standard practice to send the removed segment to the lab for analysis.
This is called a hemostat clamp. It can used to hold the sterile field together or to staunch bleeding. During one of our operations where the resident was being supervised by a provider he went to secure the clamp after having used it. Typically you secure it to the blue sterile field towels for re-use but he decided to secure it to the fleshy membrane of this patients scrotum. The patient's site was obviously numb from the local anesthetic. I guess he saw another doctor do it.
The attending physician flipped and made the resident clamp it to his nasal septum (that area between your nares). He performed the operation in tears and with a clamped septum like an oversize piercing. The attending lord over them so he had to parade around the other residents for his failure.
Anyways. Take the xanex / valium / smoke pot before the operation. Slight tugging sensations + a wheel chair ride to your car and ice pack for a few days. With luck you'll be shooting blanks in no time. In our facility it was standard practice to send the removed segment to the lab for analysis.
Famm
Ahn'Qiraj Raider
- 11,041
- 794
My brochure thing says if I don't give a semen sample after the six weeks they will send the segment to the lab at a cost to me or my insurance or whatever. And that this won't verify my sterility.
fris
Vyemm Raider
- 2,158
- 2,477
still alive
it'ss about 3 week now I guess? i'd say i'm 95%. one side of my sack is still a touch tender if I hit, have to be gentel in the shower, etc. i don't notice it as long as I have boxer briefs on, what i prefer anyways. in boxers, i can sometimes tell. for the first 2 weeks, you ahve this steady, i just got over being kicked in the nuts and it's mostly gone feeling.
my first 'nut' seemed normal, i couldn't tell any difference.
it'ss about 3 week now I guess? i'd say i'm 95%. one side of my sack is still a touch tender if I hit, have to be gentel in the shower, etc. i don't notice it as long as I have boxer briefs on, what i prefer anyways. in boxers, i can sometimes tell. for the first 2 weeks, you ahve this steady, i just got over being kicked in the nuts and it's mostly gone feeling.
my first 'nut' seemed normal, i couldn't tell any difference.
If only this were already available:http://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releas...-umc012912.php
I must say there are a lot of bad experiences floating around the internet concerning this procedure. I realize that there is a bias on more bad stories hitting the internet then good ones, but I see figures of 5% for long term complaints and that is a bit too much for my taste.
Read this page here and look at the numbers also for long term complaints:http://www.vasectomy-information.com/moreinfo/risks.htm
Hope this helps, Famm........
I must say there are a lot of bad experiences floating around the internet concerning this procedure. I realize that there is a bias on more bad stories hitting the internet then good ones, but I see figures of 5% for long term complaints and that is a bit too much for my taste.
Read this page here and look at the numbers also for long term complaints:http://www.vasectomy-information.com/moreinfo/risks.htm
Hope this helps, Famm........
I had my vasectomy in '96 at 31. In the waiting room the two receptionists were fucking with me, making loud comments to each other, like 'got the knives sharpened?', etc. Yeah, real funny stuff. Soon I went before the doctor who produced a poster-sized chart of the penis, and began a detailed explanation of the procedure. About one minute into his talk, I started getting woozy and actually passed out IN THE CHAIR. Next thing I know the doctor is behind me massaging my shoulder and putting smelling salts under my nose. I wake up and the doctor and his two nurses are laughing at me. He then says he's had men pass out during the procedure, but never during the explanation. More laughter from them.
The doctor then says he's ready to perform the deed. I'm taken aback at this, as I thought there would be a 'waiting period'. He said if he did this, none of the patients would return. He has a point. Anyway, I'm lying down and right away the doctor is slightly pissed that I didn't shave my balls good enough. He does a quick rough job himself (dry, with no shaving cream) but thankfully no nicks. The nurse who was then earlier cracking jokes at my expense comes close to me, holds my arm, and says she will talk me through the procedure. I am grateful for this. The worst part was when the nurse said to me that I might feel a slight 'tugging' sensation when my balls are being pulled from the sack to cut the cord. 'Slight tugging' my ass. While not 'painful', it definitely was the most uncomfortable feeling I have ever had. I remember seeing the movie 'Braveheart' a week after the procedure, and when Mel Gibson is being disemboweled, I had to turn away and laugh at the same time. I felt like I was reliving that shit again.
My recovery was great, practically no pain or swelling. No worries during sex now, and yes, the same amount of jizz still comes out. Just shooting blanks.
The doctor then says he's ready to perform the deed. I'm taken aback at this, as I thought there would be a 'waiting period'. He said if he did this, none of the patients would return. He has a point. Anyway, I'm lying down and right away the doctor is slightly pissed that I didn't shave my balls good enough. He does a quick rough job himself (dry, with no shaving cream) but thankfully no nicks. The nurse who was then earlier cracking jokes at my expense comes close to me, holds my arm, and says she will talk me through the procedure. I am grateful for this. The worst part was when the nurse said to me that I might feel a slight 'tugging' sensation when my balls are being pulled from the sack to cut the cord. 'Slight tugging' my ass. While not 'painful', it definitely was the most uncomfortable feeling I have ever had. I remember seeing the movie 'Braveheart' a week after the procedure, and when Mel Gibson is being disemboweled, I had to turn away and laugh at the same time. I felt like I was reliving that shit again.
My recovery was great, practically no pain or swelling. No worries during sex now, and yes, the same amount of jizz still comes out. Just shooting blanks.
Famm
Ahn'Qiraj Raider
- 11,041
- 794
I cancelled. Supposed to hit 60 degrees here Monday and the idea of sitting there recovering instead of cycling put me over the top. Also reading too many scare stories online, if I'm unlucky enough to be in the 5-10% that have problems its going to fuck up cycling for me as well and I can't deal with that. I've read as high as 15% and the idea that its a tough stat to pull because lots of men won't talk about it or even admit to people that they've had it done. I've found that to be true, which I think I mentioned on the old FoH thread, guys I know have had it act like I expect them to show it to me when I try to get details. The websites claim that internet anonymity has increased the reports of complications, not just that there aren't significant amounts of people with complaints.
It was also causing a major rift with my current G/F. I absolutely don't want kids, already raising a teenager and looking towards being done for one life. But I understand her feelings and this topic of conversation was worth forcing into light even if it means we can't continue.
And really, I'm a pussy about pain and stuff. The whole thing freaks me out, part of me is worried I'll panic. You can call the complications an outlier, but it seems like nearly 50% of the reports I read explain the actual procedure as nightmarish. They told me I can call back whenever and reschedule if I change my mind, don't need a new consultation.
I really meant to do this in dead of winter like January or February, which would have been ideal this year for being off bike and recovering. However in my area specialists are slammed busy and by the time I did the consultation they didn't have openings until March. Also doesn't help that they don't do Thursday or Friday surgery so I have to do a full work week, not a long weekend.
Seananigans
Honorary Shit-PhD
- 13,702
- 34,220
There are some theories out there that a vasectomy has some... other consequences, aside from the possible horrendous physical complications.
1) There's a subconscious psychological factor for women, where they become less attracted to a man that they KNOW can't have children.
2) The woman's body actually responds less favorably to sterile ejaculations inside her. This one is harder to explain, but basically her body gets "good vibes" from a real load, and doesn't get them from a sterile load. So even if she doesn't know you're sterile, something just isn't right, satisfying, whatever.
Neither of these are conscious things. But from what I've learned about relationships and attraction over the past 5 years of dating and research, I would never in a million years risk either of these scenarios, both of which seem quite plausible.
1) There's a subconscious psychological factor for women, where they become less attracted to a man that they KNOW can't have children.
2) The woman's body actually responds less favorably to sterile ejaculations inside her. This one is harder to explain, but basically her body gets "good vibes" from a real load, and doesn't get them from a sterile load. So even if she doesn't know you're sterile, something just isn't right, satisfying, whatever.
Neither of these are conscious things. But from what I've learned about relationships and attraction over the past 5 years of dating and research, I would never in a million years risk either of these scenarios, both of which seem quite plausible.