Yea, out in the real world it's a lot more insidious, they aren't in your face with it and it's much more gradual.  Go figure - people are more reasonable.
Like I said to Khane, nobody would ever come up to me in real life and try to explain to me how many opportunities I've had and how lucky I am.  It's just not done.
Easy examples:  My mom loves that Outlander series of books.  She asked me to read it so we could talk about it.  I read the basic synopsis and realized it's a time-traveling romance novel.  I don't like romance novels.  I told her I didn't want to read it.  "Why, because it's written by a woman?"  Lets not even bring up Bill Cosby or Hillary Clinton.
But in general, people are way less extreme in real life, I agree - don't really know how to ratchet that down online when you're accused of racism for just about anything, for example.