See, I'm glad I didn't post last night, BECAUSE shit went down while I was sleeping, lol.
And just first on the car ticket thing because people asking - The interstate speed limit in vegas is 65. I had cruise set to 70. I got pulled over just outside Vegas, on the way to Boulder, by a Boulder K9 unit. Easiliy the nicest cop I've ever run into, so at least that was good. He asked if I knew the speed limit, and I said yes, it was 65. He told me that a few miles back I passed a construction sign that said slow to 55. I didn't see it, or any sign of work, I apologized. He said he clocked me just over 70, I apologized again. He told me he was going to have the dog go through my car to smell for anything, I told him to feel free, that I had a big Drug Free straight edge tattoo across my back (BECAUSE I MAKE GREAT DECISIONS and knew everything at 18) so he won't find anything, but I'll cooperate with whatever he needs. He goes back to his car. Comes back up laughing and says "Ok, you have to tell me the story of your name" and I tell him "No really story, I'm just a wacky guy" and he laughs again. Says he's not going to use the dog, he doesn't think I'm up to anything, but he is having to write me a citation. I say I understand, I sign, he tells me to have a good night, I drive off. The end.
Now for the girl part-
So yeah, while it was fantastic, thrilling, and just alla round fucking great for 3 weeks, there were signs starting last weekend, 10 days ago. There were two days in a row I had issues with her. The first was one day we were supposed to be going out on a date and then back to my house. I was running late from work, and sent her a text asking if she could just meet me at my house about 7:30, because I was running late and wanted to grab a shower. I then entered the canyons between the town I live in and the place I work. No signal for 30ish+ minutes. I come out of the mountains to like 16 text messages. She flipped out. It started with her asking why? Followed by her saying "I guess the honeymoons over huh? You aren't picking me up anymore?" followed by her getting progressively more passive agressive until by the end she was just at "You know what, I'm staying in tonight. have a good night...."
I sent her a "WTF? I just came out of the mountains from 30 minutes without cell signal to THAT? I don't even know what to say here, I'm running late, I wanted to get a shower before I see you, and I was trying to maximise the time we have together. Plus, I thought it made more sense for you to make one trip to my house and back, rather than me making two trips to pick you up and later drop you off. It's not a big deal, I can/could have picked you up, I had no idea that me picking you up was somehow a show of affection for you. I'm going home, I'm taking a shower, I would still like to see you tonight, let me know if you calm down and change your mind."
She did, we went out, she apologized for freaking out, we had a great night. But that was the first out of the blue "What the fuck was that?" warning sign I had.
The next came the very next morning. I was on my way to work, and a song came on the radio that reminded me of her. I picked up my phone, and voice texted "Hey, just heard a song that made me think of you, google this song by this band
".
I then got to work and told my coworker about the events of the night before and how I hoped that was the random exception and not the rule. Minutes later, my phone starts going off. She thanks me for the song and then says she wants to talk.... The issue? "So, I know you got upset about me saying the honeymoon phase is over, but this is what I'm talking about. Last night the car thing, which I get now, but now this? You can't even be bothered to send me a link to the song? I have to google it myself? It just seems like such a small and simple thing, but it worries me, I feel like you are already losing interest...." ETC ETC ETC.
So yeah, I again saw her that night, and told her "Look, thats two days in a row you've freaked out about nothing, that is REALLY troubling to me. Please, stop trying to read into every little thing I do or say. I really like you, and I don't mean to offend you in any way. If I do something that bothers you, chances are I just don't rrealize it bothered you. Just stay open and talk to me, don't let it rattle around in your head and build up into something, when it was probably nothing. Chances are, I can explain, and its not a devious plan to slight you."
She agreed to try not to be crazy. Cue 4 or 5 more days of great times. I explained Rerolled to her, and she was like "That sounds like fun! as long as you crop my face out, I would love to do that." so, she wasn't bashful at all. I have a lot more pictures, and a 10 minute video (before I got tired of just holding the phone and wanted to participate
) and she was like "I really liked this, I like everything you do, lets do it again!". She was seriously an angel about everything, and just super into anything I wanted to do, and since I'm not into anything super weird, it was fucking great.
So yeah, everything's great when I leave Wed, we texted quiet a bit thurs-fri-and sat up until about 6. Next thing I know, its over sun morning. She in a relationship with another guy (who is out of state Monday). She sent me the whole explanation, but I was really shocked and blindsided and the explanation doesn't really "say" anything. When I talked to her Monday night she explained the guy was a guy she grew up with, and he wants her to go on a 40 day bike ride for charity. She knows that going with him will result in them being together, but she swears that has nothing to do with us, it's just crazy coincidence (yes, she is really adamant about this.). So, thats what happened. I know it wasn't forever, and like all of you said, I should just be thrilled the whole thing happened and I got out this easy. I was just really, really happy about the whole thing, and wasn't ready for it to be over so quickly.
So- cut to last night. She starts texting me around 6. Just chit chat stuff. I'm with my kids, so I text back here and there, but it's not my priority. I get the kids in bed at like 8:30 on the dot, and decide I'm beat after basically 48 hours of little to no sleep and emotional drain, so fuck it, I'm just going to bed too. I go climb in bed just before nine, but I, being a genius, text her back. We start talking. Talk talk talk. She informs me that she's not taking this trip now, and shes broken it off with the other guy, she doesn't want a relationship right now. She keeps talking about how she wants us to be friends. She asks if I want to hang out Saturday. I don't feel like being coy so I say this "Ok, I just want to make sure everythings clear here. You are the one who dumped me, I didn't want the relationship to end, you did, it hurt, but I understand and accept that. If you want to be friends I'm fine with that, but you're going to just have to be away that you are the one who's defining that friendship. If you just want to be text buddies like this, I can do that. If you want to get together for a movie or whatever as friends, thats fine with me. If you show up and say "Don't talk, just pleasure me" I probably will. I just don't want it to be weird or awkward or whatever. You ended it, I didn't want it to end, so just know that I'm still here for whatever."
The response I get back?
"So you want me to just be your whore?
Like we can be friends but only if I fuck you? Why don't you just fucking find someone else for that and leave me alone!"
I roll my eyes and reply back "Thats not what I said or what I meant. Look, we are both just too emotional and close to this to have a conversation. I really enjoyed my time with you and wish you only the best in your future. I hope everything works out and you find what you are looking for. I think we should just take a break, and maybe in the future we can be friends, when I'm not consumed by thoughts of you, and your not on guard and emotional when it comes to me. I'll talk to you late, Goodnight."
I then came here, read all the comments, laughed, posted last nights message and went to sleep. I woke up to 4 texts send throughtout the night.
The first is that she agree's, she loves/loved me and doesn't want that to change, and wants to stop hurting me and getting hurt herself.
The second is that she ended up talking to that guy again, and he poured his heard out, and so did she, and they are back on, it's what she needs.
The third is just saying nice things about me and letting me know how lucky she is to have gotten to be with me.
The forth was just saying more nice things, hoping I was happy, and letting me know she hopes we can hang out in the future.
SO YEAH.
I got off lucky. I shouldn't have tried to work in the sex thing at the end probably, BUT I REALLY WANTED IT
So, thats done, my divorce is next Friday. Hopefully I can leave you guys with a lack of entertainment for a while. Actually, I have an evaluation at work in an hour and a half, and while I'm expecting it to result in a raise, maybe I'll get shitcanned instead, I bet that would make for some good reading.
Anyway, thanks for all the advice/help/entertainment/laughs/and belittling! And a special thanks to BoldW on his "Onoes is doing amazing" speech. I read it and went "Yeah, why am I even being upset here, he's right." So, thanks for that!
