Soygen
The Dirty Dozen For the Price of One
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If I'm even slightly buzzed on alcohol, this is me. Obviously in some situations, this is great, but it's usually just really annoying.
Marriage and the Power of Divorce
- Thread starter Grumpus
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Guest, it's time once again for the massively important and exciting FoH Asshat Tournament!
Go here and give us your nominations!Who's been the biggest Asshat in the last year? Give us your worst ones!
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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Usually happens to me if I'm really stressed or tired, or if I mistakenly masturbated like 20 minutes ago because I thought we wouldn't have sex. I've never faked it, but I've thought about it. My wife gets all sad and acts like she isn't good enough or something. If I can't calm her down I recommend some dong sucking and that usually hits the spot.
My wife barely ever gets off, it's just the way she is. You could say it's me, maybe you'd be right, but she says she's always been this way. We work around it so she still enjoys it. She says she likes it for the "closeness" anyways. Probably some bullshit line. In a few years I'll be complaining that some dude named Pipelayer has been going to town on my wife.
My wife barely ever gets off, it's just the way she is. You could say it's me, maybe you'd be right, but she says she's always been this way. We work around it so she still enjoys it. She says she likes it for the "closeness" anyways. Probably some bullshit line. In a few years I'll be complaining that some dude named Pipelayer has been going to town on my wife.
Falstaff
Ahn'Qiraj Raider
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I envy you guys. I'm certainly no 2 pump chump, but maybe something like a 50 pump chump. I can only think of two times in my life where I've been drunk enough to not finish, but yeah I have a friend who is more like Soygen and I know his wife hates it because he loves to drink.
feels bad man. I don't mind a lot of foreplay so at least I don't leave her hanging.
feels bad man. I don't mind a lot of foreplay so at least I don't leave her hanging.
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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I've only tried to bang my wife while hammered once and it did not turn out good.
1) Tried to involve many deviant acts that my wife DID NOT want to participate in
2) Limp Dick Syndrome
1) Tried to involve many deviant acts that my wife DID NOT want to participate in
2) Limp Dick Syndrome
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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She's a bit of a prude in that respect. I've toyed (lol) with the idea with her, and she seemed receptive, but quickly said she didn't want to. Time to get her drunk.
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My wife was the same way. It takes time for people to open up sexually even they're quite open with you otherwise. Blame the protestants, sex is way too taboo in this country. The magic wand is how I eased my wife into liking anal. Didn't even buy with that intent, just liked the reactions women have when they use it.
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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She often says it is "too intense". She can't find a happy medium. I have told her to just let go but she doesn't. Probably something psychological. After almost 6 years I have all but given up.
Kirun
Buzzfeed Editor
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So much this.
A lot of it just stems from the fact that we men prefer our communication overt.
Trust me, she isn't as prude as she says she is. "Good" girls are just bad girls who never got caught. Biology always trumps conviction. You need to just take that shit, son.
TrollfaceDeux
Pronouns: zie/zhem/zer
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I know there is a surgical procedure that allows women to tighten their pussy. That's like mans equivalent of penis enlargement except pussy surgery is real....
Noodleface
A Mod Real Quick
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If you're interested, there are sex therapies that are 95+% effective at getting women to orgasm (if she can't at all, even manually, that is). It begins with teaching them how to masturbate and is designed for women who are uncomfortable with it. I don't know specifics but I'll look it up if you're interested.
(This isn't some internet nonsense. Its an empirically supported treatment for female orgasm problems)
TrollfaceDeux
Pronouns: zie/zhem/zer
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Khane
Got something right about marriage
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Uncle G. That's every woman ever my man. It's all about engaging the clit.
Gravy
Bronze Squire
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Yep, that's what I was trying to get at. There are a few gals out there that can climax without the clitoral stimulation, but they are few.
Put your face all in that mess and go to town. And while your down there, do a little exploration.
