Marriage and the Power of Divorce

Hoss

Hoss

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Khane_sl said:
The women I date are bean burritos and I want a grilled stuft burrito, extra baja sauce. But they don't exist anymore. I am doomed.
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Have you asked them to make one anyway? Most of the time they don't have Cheesy gordita crunch on the menu anymore, but they still have the ingredients and make them for me. The hardest it's ever been for me was that a manager had to be called over to tell the register monkey how to ring it up.
 
Khane

Khane

Got something right about marriage
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Hoss_sl said:
Have you asked them to make one anyway? Most of the time they don't have Cheesy gordita crunch on the menu anymore, but they still have the ingredients and make them for me. The hardest it's ever been for me was that a manager had to be called over to tell the register monkey how to ring it up.
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Where do I put my women order in?
 
Soygen

Soygen

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Sometimes a chick's corn tortilla shell is cracked. Just cover her in cheese sauce and wrap her ass with a soft flour tortilla and enjoy life.
 
Noodleface

Noodleface

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Real talk. Wife had a baby 4 months ago. We haven't slammed because she's been plagued by medical issues. When I finally do get in there.. is it going to feel different or is it going to be the same ol' vagina I've known for years?

I can't google this at work, as you can imagine.
 
P

Picasso3

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Irrelevant, tell her it's destroyed so she'll think she's all washed up and never leave you and her only avenues to satisfy her man will be oral or anal
 
Cad

Cad

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Noodlemod_sl said:
Real talk. Wife had a baby 4 months ago. We haven't slammed because she's been plagued by medical issues. When I finally do get in there.. is it going to feel different or is it going to be the same ol' vagina I've known for years?

I can't google this at work, as you can imagine.
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In my experience (I have 3 kids) it's been the same.
 
lurkingdirk

lurkingdirk

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Noodlemod_sl said:
Real talk. Wife had a baby 4 months ago. We haven't slammed because she's been plagued by medical issues. When I finally do get in there.. is it going to feel different or is it going to be the same ol' vagina I've known for years?

I can't google this at work, as you can imagine.
Click to expand...
It will be the same, and you will still want to get at it even though you saw an alien creature crawl out of it. It's still going to be great.

Yours are concerns that every father has had. You'll still very much enjoy touching, licking, and poking it.
 
Izo

Izo

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Noodlemod_sl said:
Real talk. Wife had a baby 4 months ago. We haven't slammed because she's been plagued by medical issues. When I finally do get in there.. is it going to feel different or is it going to be the same ol' vagina I've known for years?

I can't google this at work, as you can imagine.
Click to expand...
Vaginal birth? Did she tear? Usually the midwife or doc can sutur it up fairly well (grade 1 and 2) and you wont feel much difference. Grade 3-4, hard to tell.
 
Deathwing

Deathwing

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Noodlemod_sl said:
Real talk. Wife had a baby 4 months ago. We haven't slammed because she's been plagued by medical issues. When I finally do get in there.. is it going to feel different or is it going to be the same ol' vagina I've known for years?

I can't google this at work, as you can imagine.
Click to expand...
Felt the same to me, and my wife had an episiotomy.
 
Gavinmad

Gavinmad

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Unless her vajeener got demolished so bad it needed reconstructive surgery or something, everything should be back to normal once she feels comfortable having something traverse that passage again. The better she was about doing kegels before the birth, the quicker those muscles will heal from your baby wrecking them. Also helps in postpartum recovery.

Incidentally, strengthening the pc muscle group leads to better sex and more powerful orgasms for both dudes and chicks.
 
Noodleface

Noodleface

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Izo_sl said:
Vaginal birth? Did she tear? Usually the midwife or doc can sutur it up fairly well (grade 1 and 2) and you wont feel much difference. Grade 3-4, hard to tell.
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Just a very small tear that didn't even require stitches I guess.

I'm not too worried, but I did see the baby come out. Like all the purple-y skin and nasty alien umbilical cord and "OTHER SHIT" that came out.
 
Tarrant

Tarrant

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Saw this on Facebook today, reminded me of this threads last 15 pages.

rrr_img_106961.jpg
 
DickTrickle

DickTrickle

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All men are completely sane, rational, and never impulsive so at least we can counteract those crazy women.
 
opiate82

opiate82

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Noodlemod_sl said:
Real talk. Wife had a baby 4 months ago. We haven't slammed because she's been plagued by medical issues. When I finally do get in there.. is it going to feel different or is it going to be the same ol' vagina I've known for years?

I can't google this at work, as you can imagine.
Click to expand...
It will be pretty much the same but she probably won't naturally lubricate as much, so having some lube on hand (ha!) is probably a good idea.
 
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