Marriage and the Power of Divorce

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Noodleface

A Mod Real Quick
38,489
16,445
Why not? She might like it.
She has expressed a great displeasure in viewing porn.

Anecdotal and graphic story. She wasn't really into giving BJ's when we started dating, it didn't bother me too much. One day we got drunk and after I slobbered around somewhere down there on her, she reciprocated. The BJ she gave me was like one of those ones you'd see in an extreme (normal) porn - deepthroating, slapping it against her mouth, double fisting it, saying really naughty shit about what she wanted all over her face, and topped it off by giving kisses to the shaft.

So either she's fucking lying about never watching porn or she is some sort of natural talent whore.
 

Tenks

Bronze Knight of the Realm
14,163
607
I dated this one girl when I was maybe 21 or 22 and she was 18. She was also a virgin (or claimed, who knows.) Anyways to practice giving head her and her friends decided to just hone their gag reflex on a banana. So the BJ I got consisted of her just repeatedly throating my dick but doing nothing with it. Literally just putting it down her throat, coming up and doing it again. It was really fucking awkward. Like no suction or anything. I let her do it like a dozen times until I got the picture this was all I was in store to get and just stopped her. It was just disappointing since the girl I dated before her was full on porn star when it came to head with deep throating and doing some shit with her throat while it was in there and the whole package.
 

Haast

Lord Nagafen Raider
3,281
1,636
In other news, I passed out at work today due to a complex migraine with neurological symptoms. I lost all feeling in the right side of my face and my arm. I have a referral to go to a neurology clinic next week.

Anyways, wife is listed as my emergency contact so she came strait over and the moments I was awake were pretty awkward.
Stress can trigger neurological conditions. I lost about 10% of my body weight (when I was already thin) and had a couple of anxiety episodes while dealing with divorce bullshit, and my divorce was relatively smooth (it still sucked). I've heard of people having episodes of Bell's Palsy and other stress related conditions as well. Hang in there, hopefully it is just stress induced and you'll get some anti-anxiety meds to help you through rough patches.

Also, time to update the emergency contact.
 

Fifey

Trakanon Raider
2,898
962
Not at all, see second sentence.

Night time is for playing games and looking at porn, why are you on RR then?
My old habits of playing EQ/wow was having FoH open at all times for med breaks and whatever downtime.

This place does die at 5 o'clock though.
 

BrutulTM

Good, bad, I'm the guy with the gun.
<Silver Donator>
14,908
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When I worked a desk I did all my message board posting from work as well. Now I actually have to go outside and get shit done so most of my posting is done in the evenings. This works out all right because I haven't played video games for the last 7 years and porn viewing doesn't usually take me more than 15 minutes or so.
 

Tarrant

<Prior Amod>
16,028
9,464
Stress can trigger neurological conditions. I lost about 10% of my body weight (when I was already thin) and had a couple of anxiety episodes while dealing with divorce bullshit, and my divorce was relatively smooth (it still sucked). I've heard of people having episodes of Bell's Palsy and other stress related conditions as well. Hang in there, hopefully it is just stress induced and you'll get some anti-anxiety meds to help you through rough patches.

Also, time to update the emergency contact.
I tried to work last night at my night job and only lasted half my shift, went home and this morning I was at around a 7 on the pain scale and my face was tingly again. I went in and got some drugs and was told I can't return to work until Thursday at my day job and Friday at my night job.
 

lurkingdirk

AssHat Taint
<Medals Crew>
49,283
234,982
I tried to work last night at my night job and only lasted half my shift, went home and this morning I was at around a 7 on the pain scale and my face was tingly again. I went in and got some drugs and was told I can't return to work until Thursday at my day job and Friday at my night job.
Seriously? Who can you see about this? Don't ignore this, man.
 

Tenks

Bronze Knight of the Realm
14,163
607
Damn you have to work two jobs and deal with all this shit at home? I feel for you brother thats rough.
 

Lendarios

Trump's Staff
<Gold Donor>
19,360
-17,424
Teaching your girlfriend / wife how to give a blow job is a tricky proposition. It's not like you can go... "here let me show you..."
 

Hoss

Make America's Team Great Again
<Gold Donor>
27,889
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Teaching your girlfriend / wife how to give a blow job is a tricky proposition. It's not like you can go... "here let me show you..."
Take one of her hands and suck on her finger while she's blowing you. It's actually pretty cool when you do something to the finger and it gets translated to your dick. Frame it as a game so you are teaching her what you like without telling her she is terrible at blowjobs. The other option is verbal feedback. That relies on her doing something right first though. I am horrible at that. Making noise just isn't natural for me and can be a distraction.

My neurology appointment that I thought would be this week isn't until March 7th. Was the soonest I could get it.
If you think it's stress related, find a massage place. Preferably a seedy one that offers happy endings. But either way it should help. Acupuncture might work too if you're not as freaked out by needles as I am.
 

Gavinmad

Mr. Poopybutthole
44,141
53,138
A good massage from a licensed therapist will probably do more than a half-assed rubdown and handjob from an illegal immigrant who speaks 3 words of english and might be the victim of human trafficking.
 

Noodleface

A Mod Real Quick
38,489
16,445
Dude I have watched a porn where they had a camera inside the vagina and semen shot into it.. I imagine the mouth is easier